Confession 1: I’m not a huge fan of American Idol.

Confession 2: I kind of like the first few weeks of auditions.

It’s probably completely the sinful side of me that enjoys those awful auditions that make our ears bleed. Oftentimes though, I’ll watch the first few weeks of a season then check out once the competition officially begin.

I watch as people who think they can sing like an angel crash and burn in front of 3 judges and millions of TV viewers. As the hour progresses, I’m struck by a strange combination of emotions, wanting to laugh, cry, and scream at my TV all at the same time.

The whole time I’m wondering why so many of these people’s friends told them that they were good. You know that they didn’t arrive at this conclusion all by themselves. Someone else must have told them, “Umm…yeah, that’s good. You should try out for American Idol!” Or, “You’ll really go somewhere with that voice.” Or, “Yes, you are a superstar!”

I began to wonder if we try to do similar things in “community,” encouraging people where they’re not gifted. Praising people when they don’t need to be praised.

Dishonest community

In the short-run, it’s easier to choose a ‘white lie” and preserve the peace than to find a way to lovingly speak the truth.

• If I think I have the gift of teaching, but I’m awful at teaching, don’t tell me I’m good. If I didn’t do a good job, don’t tell me, “That’s the best sermon I’ve ever heard!” Be honest! It’ll sting in the short run, but like momma always said, “Honesty’s always the best policy.”
• If I think I have the gift of hospitality, but I’m a jerk when I’m hosting people in my home, don’t let me keep thinking I’m doing a great job. Authentic community is honest.
• If I think I’m a good writer, but my writing stinks, it would be unloving of you to tell me that it’s wonderful. And ultimately, if I think my writing is good, and I don’t work on it, in the long run I’ll never try to improve. And what I think I’m a superstar at will make me look foolish. I would bear the responsibility for that, but those along the way who were not honest with me would bear the load, too.

Authentic community is others-focused, not just you-focused.

Helping people understand their gifts is vital to the success of any leader. But don’t lead them to believe they’re awesome in something that they’re not. Speaking the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15) to those you participate in community with is a difficult thing to do. But it’s incredibly honoring as you seek to help someone improve a gift they’re using. Your words are setting them on a path to utilizing their gifts, not just embarrassing themselves with it.

Gifts are like muscles…they need to be exercised in order to be effective. Sometimes exercise has to start with a little honesty. And honesty is best received in the context of healthy, authentic, loving community.

 Do not lie to each other. – Colossians 3:9

 

photo credit: Creation Swap User James Cronin

Worry is a curious thing.

We think we can buy our way out of it.

We think we can think our way out of it.

We think we can outlast it.

We think we can out will-power it.

We think we can beat it.

But in the end, it will beat you.

In the end, it will destroy you.

In the end, it won’t give up.

In the end, it will dominate every area of your life.

In the end, it will leave you afraid.

In the end, you’ll be its slave.

Worry withers under the burden of Hope.

And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith? – Jesus (Matthew 6:30)

* Photo credit: Creation Swap user James Cronin

 

On every day ending in “1,” I’m writing an 11 word post.

Doing the same things over and over again bores me (see what I mean HERE)…which is why I’m trying this new 11-word series out.  If you’d like to catch up with this series, click HERE.

11s on the 1s

Without love, Truth is

Obnoxious

Offensive

Empty

Impersonal

Insignificant.

Relationships matter.

 

I’m reading the book Think Orange, by Reggie Joiner, and find much of it fresh and challenging.  I thought I’d share this with you.  I love what Reggie has to say in this quote (taken from page 136).  It’s kind of long, but worth the 3o seconds it will take you to read it.  Just trust me.

“Up until the sixteenth century, carrots were grown in a variety of hues: red, black, yellow, purple, and even white.  There were no orange carrots until the seventeenth century when some Dutch growers began feeling patriotic.  In honor of their king, William of Orange, they married some yellow and red carrots to produce our modern day orange carrots.

I imagine there must have been some orange-carrot skeptics in the beginning.  They were probably overheard saying things like, “These can’t be true carrots,” or “Carrots aren’t supposed to look like that,” or “Those are not the kind of carrots my parents ate.”  Nevertheless, the color of carrots changed forever.  But here’s an important point: Changing the color of carrots did not alter the fundamental nature of the carrot.  In other words, orange carrots were just as nutritious as black carrots.  The only real difference between the two was that more people were willing to eat orange carrots than black ones.

If you knew more kids and students would engage in what you teach if you packaged it differently, would you?  Would you color it orange if more kids would listen?  Before you start using phrases like “watering down the truth” or “not deep enough,” just remember you can change the color of something without compromising its nature.  It doesn’t mean you weaken your message just because you focus on what your audience needs.

The principle is clear; If you want more people to eat carrots, then change the color.  If you want more students to listen to what is true, change how you present it.”

What do you think?  Can we change the way we present the Truth (or the way that we “do church,”) without altering the Biblical message?