Category: Church (page 17 of 28)

You and your gifts

August 26, 2011 / / 0 Comments

I need you and your gifts. Because without you, I’m incomplete.

Without you, I look silly.

Without you, I look like a mouth. I can scream and shout, but I can’t hear anything. And do you know how annoying that is…the guy who talks but doesn’t listen?

Without you, I’m a hand that’s stuck in one place. I can’t move. I need you. I’m like The Thing. Just plain weird.

Without me, you’re a foot that can walk anywhere it pleases…but can’t pick anything up. Because…have you ever tried to hold a hammer with your foot? Ever tried to write a note with your foot? Good luck with that.

Without me, you’re a set of eyes that can do nothing about what you see. And I can’t even begin to fathom how frustrating that would be.

I need you and you need me. There’s just no getting around that.

And when we work together, it’s called the Church.

We’re better together.

Yes, the body has many different parts, not just one part. If the foot says, “I am not a part of the body because I am not a hand,” that does not make it any less a part of the body. And if the ear says, “I am not part of the body because I am not an eye,” would that make it any less a part of the body? If the whole body were an eye, how would you hear? Or if your whole body were an ear, how would you smell anything? – 1 Corinthians 12:14-17

 

 

 

The art of the spoken word

August 24, 2011 / / 2 Comments

Over the past few months, I’ve had the chance to preach at my church, Grace Community Church, three times.

And I’ve loved it. Each time, though, I’ve learned quite a few things. Some about myself. Some about the art of preaching. You can read what I’ve learned HERE and HERE.

Well, this past Sunday was no exception.

5 Observations about Preaching

1. It’s incredibly easy to get distracted.

I notice every single person that stands up to leave. Every one. And I try oh so hard to not get distracted by them. Remember that next time you get up in the middle of a sermon.

2. To preach well, you have to give of yourself.

When I preach, I pour myself, my life, my personality, my research, my stories, my heart and my mind into the craft. And this past Sunday, I had the privilege of preaching 3 times. It was a beautiful exhaustion.

3. Beware the death blow.

Want to know how to deal a crushing blow to a pastor? Right after they say ‘Amen,’ find them in the hallway and tell them which part(s) of their message were a disaster. They’ll love you for it. And by love, I mean…watch out, because they may swing at you.  Preachers should elicit feedback, but it’s okay to wait a day or two.

4. If you want to get better, you’ve got to work at it.

I work to get better every single time. I evaluate what I said and how I said it so that next time I can communicate more effectively. And, hopefully, I’m improving.

5. Preaching is an unbelievably incredible motivational tool.

I talk so much about the importance of community. In fact, that’s what my sermon was about on Sunday. And I talk so much about community that I can almost forget how powerful the public, spoken word can be in someone’s life. We saw people taking steps of faith in droves on Sunday, as they took a step towards community by signing up for small groups.

Question: Has God worked in your life through hearing someone preach?

 

 

The con panna

August 23, 2011 / / 0 Comments

When I was in graduate school, I worked at a coffee shop.

There, I developed a great love for coffee.  Good coffee.  Coffee that’s handpicked, handcrafted, and consumed at just the right temperature.  Coffee that’s paired with the right pastry, in the right season, at the right…heck, who am I kidding?  I’ll drink coffee anytime.

My all-time favorite hand-crafted masterpiece was the con panna.

photo via Justin Mcintosh

Con Panna means “with cream,” and it’s a simple drink to make.  Grab a canister of whip cream.  Then pull 2 (or, if you’re feeling extra frisky, make it 3) shots of espresso.  As soon as the shots are done brewing, transfer the shots to your demitasse cup, then top with whip cream.  It’s heaven. In a cup.

Most coffee shops, though, won’t have this drink listed on the menu.  They’ll have the traditional cappuccinos, lattes, and cafe mochas.  But no con panna.  And it’s not that they don’t know how to make it.  It’s just not a huge seller in America.  Most people in America want something with a little less kick…a little smoother and creamier.  They’re not looking for something with so much punch.

But if you want to be super cool, just order a con panna next time you’re at your local coffee shop. The barista will look at you with eyes that say, (*read the following with an Italian gangster accent)

How do you know about the con panna?

Then you’ll look back with eyes that say,

Hey! I know my stuff!

To which his eyes will respond,

A’right. A’right. I didn’t know. I’ll give ya a little respect.

To which your eyes will respond,

Don’t mess it up. I might mess you up.

I’ve shared the beauty of this drink with a lot of folks who frequent coffee shops.  You know what every one of them tells me?  “I am going to order that drink next time I go!”  Why?

Because everyone wants to feel like an insider.

There’s something about us that wants to feel like we have a leg-up on others.  That we’re a step ahead.  We know a bit more.  We are in a bit deeper.  We’re just a little bit more awesome than the rest of the people in this coffee shop.

You might spin that thought and think that it’s related to pride.  But I don’t think it is.  I think it’s a reflection of our desire to learn, grow, change, and improve.  And when it comes to leading people, this is an invaluable quality to overlook.

In leading people, help them feel like they’re insiders.

  • Let them know what’s coming next…before it comes.
  • Run an idea by them before it’s announced publicly.
  • Ask for their input in prep for your next event.
  • Tell them an idea you’ve been sitting on but haven’t fleshed out.
  • Ask them to lead in an area that you haven’t yet explored as an organization.
  • Encourage them to bring their ideas to the table…and then act on some of them.

The more knowledge you give people, the more valued they feel.

The more knowledge you give people, the more they feel like a vital part of the organization.

The more knowledge you give people, the more they will give of themselves.

The more knowledge you give people, the better results your entire team will experience.

Try it.

Question:

Have you ever had a con panna?  Do you even like coffee?

 

Why I chose to be ordained

August 15, 2011 / / 5 Comments

Recently, my church, Grace Community Church, ordained me.   It was an unbelievable kind of an experience for me. It was so incredibly special, and will be a great marker for me for the rest of my life.

But I had a lot of people ask me why I wanted to get ordained. Why, especially because I was already licensed (which is the process that the state recognizes for me to be able to marry and bury)?   Why, especially because it wouldn’t change my title or job description at Grace?   Why, especially because it wasn’t something our church had ever done before?  Why, especially because it’s more of a ‘traditional’ church-y thing, and I’m not ‘traditional’ or church-y?

There are a few reasons why I wanted to be ordained, and why I wanted to do it at this point in my ministry.

Why ordination?

Ordination affirms your call to ministry.

In the process of ordination, I got to share my story, and sit before the elders and others at Grace for them to question me on my calling, my theology, and my future aspirations. We talked through safeguards I have in place in my life, and how I pursue God. Those men affirmed God’s working in my life.   And I needed that.

Ordination tells you that other people have your back.

In a sense, ordination is a time where other guys hear your story and say, “Yep, we understand what God’s calling you to do…now go do it! We’ve got your back.”  And I needed that.

Ordination is an important step for pastors.

People often associate “you know what you’re talking about” with ordination.   There’s a different level of respect.  And it’s not that I think I deserve or have earned that…I don’t think I’m entitled to it. Rather, I know that the title “ordained” carries weight with it.  And I’m ready for that weight.

Ordination helps others understand their call.

In the process of public ordination, a local church sees someone who has been called to full-time vocational ministry. And I’m convinced that when they see that, God works in their heart. And sometimes He begins to plant the seeds of ministry in their heart, too. Because I know that it’s been in hearing other people’s stories that mine has seemed to gain more clarity.  And the church needs that.

Why at this point?

Ordination shouldn’t be rushed.

I’ve been on staff now for nearly 4 years.  I could’ve been ordained sooner, but I wanted to wait until Grace really knew me and my character.   I wanted many people in the church to be able to honestly say, “I can also affirm God’s call on your life.”  If I’d gone through this process earlier, there would’ve been some people who would’ve come down to pray over me.   But it would’ve likely been those people who just felt like they had to do it.  Now, there were lots of folks who came down front to pray over me…and these people have actually done life with me for nearly 4 years. They’ve seen my character and served with me, and are truly willing to stand beside me as I continue fleshing out God’s call for my life.  That’s much more meaningful to me than a forced ceremonial ordination.

I’m glad I went through this process.  It’s help me sure up my call, surrounded me with men who know who I am, and given me a renewed sense of God’s call on my life.

Question:

Have you been ordained?  Was it a good experience for you?

 


 

 

The most commonly used prayer phrase

August 9, 2011 / / 2 Comments

Growing up in the church, I’ve heard many, many different public prayers.

image via iStock Photo

Small group prayers are the best. They’re personal, genuine, and heart-felt. What’s better than requesting prayer, then having someone pray for you right there on the spot?!?  My most intense times of prayer, when I’ve felt closest to God, have been in the context of healthy community.

But there’s one thing I’ve noticed. And I don’t think I’m the only one who’s heard this. In fact, I think it’s the most commonly used prayer phrase. And when it’s used, it stands out like that one final nail that you still haven’t hammered in on the pergola in your backyard.  All you hear is this phrase.   It usually comes after a brief, awkward, I-don’t-know-what-to-say-now pause.  Maybe you’ve heard it.  It goes like this:

…and that situation…

“Lord, please be with Sally and Vick this week, and help them out…and that situation.”

“God, you know better than I do all of the difficulties John is facing in life…and that situation.”

“Lord, you love Gary, and I ask you help him out with his house…and that situation.”

“And that situation” becomes the way to close the deal. Hang up the phone with God. It sounds irreverent to say, “Later, God…” and so the question is, “How do I tell God, and the small group, that I’m done with that request?”

Enter “and that situation.”

It’s a fantastic catch-all, really. Because when you say it, everyone in the room goes, “Ohhh…that situation. Yeah, that’s bad. That situation.”

Here are 5 other times when “and that situation” fits beautifully.

5 Times for the “And That Situation”

1. When you’ve not listened closely enough to the request to remember the details, just drop a “and that situation.”

No reason to listen closely anymore when people share their prayer requests.  You’ve got a perfect fall-back, catch-all, I-love-each-and-every-person-in-my-group phrase.  Repeat after me: And. That. Situation.

2. When your group isn’t close enough to share the details of life, and you honestly don’t know the details of “that situation.”

Don’t press in to know people. That’s too difficult and too “honest.”  Let it ride.  “And that situation.”

3. When you have no idea what else to say, slip in a “and that situation.”

If it doesn’t naturally fit, it’s okay.  God will fist-bump you for hanging up the phone with class.

4. When you don’t know the person you’re praying for very well.

“Would they be comfortable with me repeating details before God?  Would God even want me to do that?”  Don’t make things too awkward.  Don’t try to get to know them later on so that next time you pray you won’t question things.  “And that situation” that thing and move right on.

5. When you don’t have the words to adequately express your heart, push things back on God.

The Holy Spirit intercedes for us, right? I bet his “groans” sound something like a holy “and that situation.” (see Romans 8:26)

Question:

Have you ever heard little phrases creep in to your prayers?

Have you ever heard “and that situation?”

 

 

 

The Nines…online goodness

August 2, 2011 / / 5 Comments

The Nines is a conference (online) I look forward to every year. (you can register for it, for free, right HERE)

It’s a conference with 99 speakers, each with a 9 minute platform to share their thoughts, and for pastors and church leaders to learn from each other.  It’s proven to be a great idea generator for me.

They have a number of speakers that they choose beforehand, but they reserve a certain number of spots for “write-in” votes.  The “people’s choice awards” of the church leaders community.

And this year, instead of just giving my virtual “thumbs up” to the guys and gals I nominated, I thought I’d give a little explanation, and a further encouragement for you to “thumbs up” them, too.  Here’s my list.

My votes for The Nines:

Ron Edmondson

he’s a leader of leaders. He’s one of those guys that, when he speaks, I’ve got to have a pen and paper handy (err…your Evernote account just needs to be up) just to keep up with the flow from the fire hydrant of ministry goodness.  Connect with him on Twitter, Facebook, and on his blog.

He can share enough wisdom in 9 minutes to start a revolution.

Jonathan Pearson

He’s creative, he’s genuine, and he’s generous. He’s the communications pastor at Cornerstone Community Church, and few understand communications like Jonathan does. He speaks clearly to, and for, his generation.  Connect with him on Twitter, Facebook, and his blog.

Give him 9 minutes, and you’ll hear and understand the heartbeat of a generation.

Brandon Cox

Brandon is currently a church planter by profession. And a great one at that. But over the last year, as he and I have connected online and in person, I’ve been struck by his wisdom and winsomeness when it comes to networking. There are few as connected as Brandon. He’s a master with people.  Connect with him on Twitter, Facebook, and his blog.

In 9 minutes, you’ll believe in the power of social media to connect with the world.

If you agree with any of these nominations, head on over to The Nines site and give them a “thumbs up” HERE.

 

 

God behind bars

August 1, 2011 / / 4 Comments

I’m thrilled to be promoting a new ministry today, God Behind Bars.

There are close to three million prisoners now in the United States.  God’s prompting of the founder, Jake Bodine, and the skyrocketing number of incarcerated men and women in the United States has led directly to the creation of this one-of-a-kind prison ministry, God Behind Bars.

Check out this video:

Here is what makes God Behind Bars unique:

  • Unique four-step strategy that will allow a person to have full life change instead of some life change.
  • Partner with churches and faith-based organizations to stream live, dynamic, high-quality worship experiences into prisons all over the world.
  • Online campus called “Church With Inmates” that allows the families of prisoners to see and experience the same service that their loved one is watching from inside the prison.
  • Intentional about family reunification through outreach ministries such as their promising new children’s ministry “Project 22”, a ministry focused on providing children of inmates with a safe place to live and restoring the child and parents relationship through biblical principals.
  • Next-generation aftercare program that pledges to walk with and care for each former prisoner who completes the three prerequisite steps. Among some things that will be provided initially by the ministry are temporary living quarters, groceries, gas, a cell phone, clothes, employment training and placement.

If you’d like to connect with God Behind Bars, you can do so HERE.

 

 

My small group awesomeness contest

July 28, 2011 / / 10 Comments

My small group is way, way better than yours.  Why?

2 words: catfish fry.

Last week, we had our small group, including children, over to our house to fry up some catfish, french fries, and hushpuppies.  We topped that off with roasted marshmallows for dessert.  You. Can. Not. Beat. That.  Even if you get all “holy” and “we-study-the-Bible” on me.

But I’ll give you a chance, in just a moment.

Let me tell you about a new site, Only144.com.  It’s like Groupon, but for churches.  They’re a brand new company, trying to get word out about what they do.  They’ll be offering phenomenal deals for churches on various resources.  This has the potential to really help local churches out in a huge way.

In fact, they’ll be offering some small group curriculum that has the chance to shape your church culture in a huge way.

And in order to help get the word out about their new site, they’re willing to give away $600 worth of curriculum here through my blog!

If you win, you’ll get:

This contest on my blog is super-short…less than 24 hours!

If you’d like to enter, please do at least 1 of the following:

1. Leave a comment below trying to convince me that your small group is better than mine.  Good luck with that.

2. Tweet or Facebook the following: My small group’s awesomer than yours…about to win $600 in resources to prove it! Details: http://ow.ly/5PPaT

In your tweet, mention me using @benreed, or in your Facebook status be sure to tag me so I can find your post and include you in the drawing.

Feel free to enter the contest as many times as you’d like…each time you Tweet, Facebook, or comment, you’re entering your name into the pot.

The contest will end on Friday, July 29th, at 12:00 pm central time.  So hurry up and get those entries in!

 

Good leaders are good listeners

July 19, 2011 / / 1 Comment

My son is piecing lots of words and thoughts and phrases together.  It’s quite hilarious, actually.  Here are a few he’s said recently.

Right there!  Daddy…Poppy…eat…hot!

Translation: “I ate dinner there with Poppy one night, and his plate was so hot it burned me.”

Oh no! Wait…Daddy…church…right there!

Translation: “We just drove by the road that we turn down to go to church…turn around!”

Me…Daddy…play…school

Translation: “Daddy and I played on the playground at that school and it was fun!”

Daddy…outside…work…help…me

Translation: ‘I helped Daddy work outside.’ (see picture below for when he said that)

Daddy…back…hat?

Translation: “Daddy, would you turn your hat around backwards?”

Daddy…yucky

Translation: “Daddy, you smell bad.”  (I get that one a lot…)

But this is the one that takes the cake:

Daddy die!

Out of context, this statement from my son seems oddly dark and twisted.  In context it makes perfect sense.  I promise you my son is not a weirdo.

See, if you’d been there in the moment, you wouldn’t have thought anything was out of place.  He was riding his four-wheeler, and right in the middle of the yard, the battery died.  All he was doing was letting me know that, so that I’d go plug it back in and charge it up.  Not weird at all.

And that’s what building a relationship does.  It helps put things into context.  It helps make sense of a person.  Learning their story, understanding their struggles, their heartaches, their missed opportunities, their hopes and dreams takes them from being an “outsider” to being someone you relate with and that you can serve with.  All of a sudden, they’re not so un-relatable…you begin to see how your stories at some level mesh, and how you can speak truth into that person’s life.

Relationships are difficult, no doubt.  And they’re messy and frustrating and will test your patience and your life’s calling.  But taking the time to hear someone’s story, helping them pull out the bright spots, shining light in the dark places, will make you a better leader.  Because through truly getting to know people, not just brushing them off and casting them to the side, you’ll grow to love them more.

People aren’t a means to an end.  They’re your calling.  It doesn’t matter what “business” you’re in.

Good leaders are good listeners.

 

 

7 Personal Truths I Learned Through Preaching

July 18, 2011 / / 11 Comments

I’m a “learner,” at least according to Strengths Finder.  I enjoy learning new things, exploring new ideas, and trying to understand different systems.  But sometimes I “learn” about myself.  And that seems to happen each time I preach.

Last time I preached, I learned a lot about myself. See what I mean HERE.

I had the opportunity of preaching again at my church, Grace Community Church, yesterday.

7 Personal Truths I learned Through Preaching

1. I’m hard on myself.

Always. In fact, I’m probably much harder on myself after I preach than others are. I know the spots where I swung and missed, the spots where I didn’t connect, and what I should’ve said differently. And I’m good at beating myself up.

2. I’m vulnerable right after the message.

I’m all about “constructive criticism,” but I need some time. Give me a few hours…24, if you’re feeling extra generous.

3. Rehearsing through the whole sermon a few times helps me a ton.

I’ve started doing this, practicing through the whole sermon a few times, from start to finish, adding in key phrases, transitions, and striking things that are out of place. When I’m piecing things together throughout the week, I find I inevitably leave out key pieces of the puzzle.

4. I carry a lot of the emotional weight of the room.

I shared a heavy message yesterday, and I could definitely feel the weight of emotion in the room as I preached. This thought encourages me to pray for my pastor more…even while he’s preaching.

5. Preaching drains me.

I said this last time, but I’ll say it again. After I’m done preaching, I feel like I’ve worked a full day.

6. “Great message!” doesn’t do much for me.

It doesn’t feel all that encouraging. I’d much rather hear something like, “That’s what I needed to hear.” Even if it comes through an email.

7. Preaching is a lot of work.

The prep that goes into each message takes lots of time. The guys that do this every week are studs. Props to Ron Edmondson and Chad Rowland, my pastors!

8. Preaching connects me with God unlike anything else.

My mind is more active, my spirit more tuned in, and my heart is more primed.  Preaching, for me, is the culmination of a lot of intense preparation.  And I feel tightly connected with God through it.

Question: Do any of these resonate with you?

 

 
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