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Triple Threat Leadership

June 21, 2010 / / 2 Comments

A friend of mine, Alan Danielson (on Twitter HERE), has recently released a self-published book, Triple Threat Leadership (to read all of his posts on Triple Threat Leadership from his blog, click HERE).

Triple-Threat Leadership is written to help you understand and developing the three skills that are absolutely necessary for you to be an effective leader: casting vision, creating strategy and fostering relationships.   Alan does a great job unpacking each of these leadership qualities, and works to help you implement them in your leadership roles.  Included in the book is an assessment that you fill out that will help diagnose your leadership strengths and show you the weak areas you need to work on.

Instead of me giving you a rundown of the highlights of the book, I thought I’d let Alan convince you why you need to read it.

What was your driving inspiration/catalyst for this project?

Triple-Threat Leadership is a concept that’s been growing in me for many years. In my 20 years experience leading churches I’ve seen the Triple-Threat principles surface repeatedly, and over time I began to articulate what I was observing. In a sentence, Triple-Threat Leadership is based on the belief that good leaders do three things well: cast vision, create strategy, and foster relationships. I found these observations to be universal truths that applied to all leadership situations, and whenever I’ve utilized and/or shared the principles people have whole-heartedly agreed with my findings. I have a passion to help people in any and all kinds of leadership roles, so I put my thoughts on paper, created a workshop and began sharing it with clients. Finally, I’ve written the book at the urging of my friends, and clients who have learned these principles and seen them in action.

I’m sure that the readers here have lots of books on their shelf right now to read. Why should yours be the one they pick up next?

First, because everyone’s followed a bad leader at some point and hated it. No one wants to be a bad boss, manager, or volunteer leader and this book will help them avoid the pitfalls they’ve seen others fall into. Second, because it’s a concise, easy read that will affirm what people already believe about leadership, while at the same time challenging them to become even more effective leaders. Third, because it gives leaders a common vocabulary that will help them simply and accurately discuss their leadership successes and challenges. Lastly, because it will clearly expose people’s blind spots and help them know how to dramatically improve their leadership ability.

What value do you think this book has for small group pastors/leaders?

The Triple-Threat principles apply across the board, so small group pastors and leaders will immediately see how it can impact their own leadership settings. The book is not just for CEOs or Senior Pastors. It’s for anyone who is in leadership.

Some people say that, in leadership, you should work on what you’re good at, and the stuff you’re weak on…just find somebody else to do that. Yet you encourage readers to work on their weak spots, too. Why?

Great question! This book is not about shoring up all of your weak spots. This book is not about being good at all leadership skills. This book is about being good at the three most important leadership skills. Regardless of your leadership talent or personality type, all leaders need the three skills outlined in Triple-Threat Leadership. Leaders lacking one or two of the skills detailed in this book will be able to lead, to a point, but they will never reach their fullest potential.

If you’d like the chance to win a free copy of Alan’s book, either:

1. Leave a comment on this blog telling me what your favorite color is.

2. Tweet this: Check out @benreed ‘s interview w @alandanielson & his take on leadership here: http://ow.ly/219×3

If you’re not a winner, or you don’t have a favorite color, you can still get a 10% discount by using this coupon code at checkout: benreed

 

A Letter To My Dad

June 20, 2010 / / 4 Comments

Dad,

I can’t get away from your reputation.  Everywhere I go.  Everyone I talk to.  Every event I attend.  Everybody knows Pete.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard, “Is Pete your daddy?”  Or have been introduced as, “Hey, you know Pete Reed, right?  This is his son…”  Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I look a little bit like you.  Or maybe it has something to do with the fact that you’ve left a huge impression on so many people.

No matter where I go, your reputation precedes me.

And Dad, you may not know it, but you’ve made my life much easier.

Dads can make it extremely difficult on sons.  Even after we leave home.  But somehow you avoided ever doing that.  And I don’t have to overcome barriers in Clarksville as I minister to people because I’m able to stand on your shoulders and your character.  You have paved the way for me, people know and respect you, and I’ve inherited a respect that you’ve earned.

You’re leaving a lasting legacy.  One I’m trying to live up to every day.

Your exemplary life at home and in the community causes others to look at me differently.

Thanks for always being a great Dad.

 

A Letter to My Dad

June 20, 2010 / / 0 Comments

Dad,

I can’t get away from your reputation.  Everywhere I go.  Everyone I talk to.  Every event I attend.  Everybody knows Pete.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard, “Is Pete your daddy?”  Or have been introduced as, “Hey, you know Pete Reed, right?  This is his son…”  Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I look a little bit like you.  Or maybe it has something to do with the fact that you’ve left a huge impression on so many people.

No matter where I go, your reputation precedes me.

And Dad, you may not know it, but you’ve made my life much easier.

Dads can make it extremely difficult on sons.  Even after we leave home.  But somehow you avoided ever doing that.  And I don’t have to overcome barriers in Clarksville as I minister to people because I’m able to stand on your shoulders and your character.  You have paved the way for me, people know and respect you, and I’ve inherited a respect that you’ve earned.
You’re leaving a lasting legacy.  One I’m trying to live up to every day.

Your exemplary life at home and in the community causes others to look at me differently.

Thanks for always being a great Dad.
 

Don’t make it worse

June 18, 2010 / / 0 Comments

Singing cheerful songs to a person with a heavy heart
is like taking someone’s coat in cold weather or pouring vinegar in a wound (Proverbs 25:20)

Sometimes, our counsel can make things worse.

We feel like we’re being helpful, but in reality, we make life more painful and difficult to bear.

So next time someone you know is dealing with a lot of life, and isn’t sure how to handle it, don’t try singing a happy song.  Don’t sugar coat things and tell them that it’s not that bad.  Because maybe it is that bad.

Instead, try weeping with those who weep. (Romans 12:15)

Or just being quiet. (Job 2:13)

Or pointing them to the unchanging hope of life with Christ.  Not to the quickly fading hope of a good and easy life on earth. (2 Corinthians 1:5)


 

Small Groups & Communion

June 17, 2010 / / 4 Comments

Eating the equivalent of a savory version of Listerine Breath Strip and drinking half of an espresso shot of wine (or grape juice, for us Baptists) is a huge deal in the Church today.

For whenever you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord’s death until he comes. (1 Corinthians 11:26)

The weight a local church places on communion (a.k.a., the Lord’s Supper, the Eucharist), the frequency it’s practiced, who administers it, how it is administered, whether it’s fresh bread or stale, the effect (or affect…I never know which to use) it has on a person’s life (the removal of sin, a dispensation of grace, a memorialization, etc.), what happens in the bread and wine (does it change from its visible form to the actual body and blood of Christ?), among other debates points to the significance of this symbolic post-breakfast, incredibly light and untasty, snack.

One thing I’m working through at Grace is the idea of small groups holding communion with their group.  I know that many people will throw up red flags at the very thought of communion happening outside of the walls of a church building, administered by someone not on a church staff.  But hear me out.

It seems to make sense for a few reasons.

Why it makes sense to encourage communion in small groups:

1. It’s difficult to do on Sunday mornings because of the way our theater is set up.  Holding services in a school has its limitations, and the logistics of pulling off the Lord’s Supper is a difficult one.  We’ve tried many different ways, and to be honest, none has worked exceedingly well.

2. It doesn’t feel intimate.  It loses its relational edge in a Sunday morning gathering environment.

3. Our services are 1 hour long.  In order to do communion “right” (giving it its proper place, explaining its significance, giving people space to process, celebrating, etc.), it takes some time.  And in a 1 hour service, either everything is rushed or various parts are cut out, neither of which is desirable.  Small groups afford much more time.

4. We don’t hold communion with great frequency.  Why not?  See above reasons.

5. We ask our small group leaders to act as shepherd leaders.  It makes great sense for them to administer this with their groups.

6. Life change is happening at the small group level.  One beautiful way of acknowledging and celebrating the change that Christ is making, and has made, in a person’s life, is through celebrating the death, burial, and resurrection (communion) together.

7. Small groups can practice communion as often as they would like.

8. The relational aspect of the Lord’s Supper can really happen in a small group environment.  In a large group setting (Sunday mornings), often the relational side of communing together just can’t happen.

Some concerns that will be brought up:

1. We’ve never done it this way before.  It’s not what we’re used to.

2. In a small group, it’s outside of the direct oversight of the church leadership/elders.

3. It could get really messy really quickly.  If you have small group leaders who don’t know what they’re doing, they could wrongly administer the Lord’s Supper. (see 1 Corinthians 11:27-32)

4. It’s not biblical.

I’ll follow up this post with my thoughts concerning each of the above objections.

What do you think?  Is it right (and good) for small groups to administer the Lord’s Supper?  Or is a dangerous, non-biblical slope you’re not willing to go down?

 

Flashlight & Pepper Spray

June 15, 2010 / / 2 Comments

Yesterday, I posted this on Twitter:

Thought it was a pocket flashlight. Turns out it was pepper spray. Dumbest thing I’ve done in a long time.

Lots of people were wanting more details, so here you go.

So I was cleaning up the house, and in one of the drawers beside our entryway table, where we keep the phonebooks that we never use, I noticed this little device.  I had just given my son a flashlight to play with (not even 5 minutes before that) so that I could get the work done (it’s so hard to clean anything when a 20 month old is running around the house).  I thought, “Hey, this flashlight is smaller.  He’ll love this one…but does it work?”  I found the button that I thought turned it on, and pushed it.  Seriously, this thing looks just like a pocket flashlight.  But when I pushed the button, red juice came out.  I thought, “Don’t think this is a flashlight,” and immediately realized that the red liquid on my hand (because the nozzle was facing downwards) was pepper spray.  “I don’t remember putting this in here” was immediately followed by coughing and burning eyes.

And more coughing.

For a solid hour, my whole family was coughing.

Pure stupidity on my part.

But the thing really looked like a pocket flashlight.

Picture of said pepper sprayer

 

Building a loyal audience

June 15, 2010 / / 0 Comments

Building trust takes a long time.  And it takes consistency.  And perseverance.

It’s not developed overnight.  And though working on a path cleared for you by others helps, you’ve still got to do the hard work of building trust.

The same thing is true whether you’re building a relationship with someone you’re trying to help grow in their faith, trying to build a new company, planting a church, launching a blog, starting a movement, or trying to change the culture of an age-old tradition.

Share information that’s valuable and you’ll slowly but surely build a loyal audience.  You may not see the results today.  And you probably won’t see the ROI tomorrow.

But in the long run, you’ll find that consistently sharing valuable information builds trust, and leaves you with a tribe of followers.

 

Google Reader

June 14, 2010 / / 0 Comments

Before the invention of newspaper deliver services, if you wanted the daily news, you had to visit a newsstand.  And if you wanted more than one newspaper, you were having to go to more than one newsstand every morning to purchase the papers (in hopes that they were still available by the time you arrived).

But then things changed.  Enter the newspaper subscription service.

Wake up.  Walk to your front porch.  Bam…you’ve got your newspapers waiting on you every day.  Genius.

Convenience for you.  Guaranteed service for you.  Guaranteed sales for the newspaper industry.

But when news began to be offered increasingly online (through media outlets and blogs), we as a consumer industry fell right back into the days of walking to multiple newsstands.  We would peruse multiple sites, visit countless blogs, and still not get all of the great news that was available.  Because for every site you checked, there were 1,000 others you didn’t check.  And it just wasn’t feasible to keep up with all of the blogs you found helpful, because you would forget to check them for a few days (or a few weeks), and when you finally remembered, you were way behind.

It’s time to make the internet work for us.

Google Reader

Enter the automated delivery service for digital media: RSS (Really Simple Syndication).  Google Reader is my feed reader of choice.  It gathers all of the new content from the blogs and sites that I visit, and keeps me from having to visit each of those sites individually.  And I can read this content on any computer or mobile phone by simply logging into my account.  Here’s how to get started:

1. Register for a Google Reader account.

2. Come back to my site and click the “RSS” link.

The next step is to visit the sites you love, and look for this symbol: Just click on that button (to the right), and it will prompt you to subscribe to their content.  Simple.

Here are some of the small group sites (some not solely focused on group life) that I have on my Google Reader:

Google Reader is free.  And it keeps you from having to visit multiple newsstands every day.

Did I miss any blogs that are small groups-related?


 

Failure: The Secret to Success

June 11, 2010 / / 1 Comment

I have lots of respect for the Honda company now.

“The idea is that you can fail 100 times…if you succeed once.”

We will have loads of bad ideas.  Ones that fall flat on their faces.  Maybe even right out of the gate.  And we’ll have to take the rap, own up to our mistakes, and learn from them.

Because a failure doesn’t mean that we’re done.

(HT: Mike Foster)


 

Starbucks, Consistency, and Small groups

June 10, 2010 / / 1 Comment

I have a Starbucks “Black Card.”  It’s supposed to give various perks, one of which, from day 1, was free refills.  Until today.  I asked for a refill, gave the card to the cashier, and she said, “Do you have money loaded on this card?”  I said, “I don’t need money loaded on it…the refill should be free.”  She said, “Nope.  Not on this card it’s not.  You need a different card for the refill to be free.”

Starbucks is supposed to be the king of consistency.  A Hazelnut latte should taste the same in Belgium as it does in coffee mecca (Seattle).  They should look and feel the same wherever you are.  Consistency, and brand management, help people to feel “at home” when they go to a Starbucks that’s not their regular shop.  But when that consistency is broken, and that which used to go along with the Black Card changes, things no longer seem as…well…consistent.

A while back, we had a small group that was really struggling getting people to show up.  They had been meeting for 6 months, and had moved from 18 folks to 8.  The leader and his wife were incredibly gracious hosts, gifted in ministry, lovable, and fully bought into the mission and vision of Grace (our church).  I sat down with the leader to try to troubleshoot.  As I talked with the leader, and other group members, we came to the same conclusion.  Here’s what was happening.

The group leader was gifted in teaching, and had great ease in front of people.  He was also incredibly busy with work.  That deadly combination led him to not work on (or lead his group through) any kind of curriculum (not that every group needs to have a curriculum, but every group should have a plan).  In short, from week to week and month to month, he wasn’t taking his people anywhere.  Instead, he would show up each week and just start throwing out thoughts and questions randomly, relying on his gift of gab and natural ease in leading people.  This led to frustration as the group members never knew how to prepare for their small group time.  They didn’t know what to think through, what to read, or what questions to be prepared to answer.  The group members never knew what to expect, and never knew where the group was headed.  Trust was never built, and the group fizzled out.

While it’s not vital that your group utilize a curriculum, it is vital that you take your group somewhere.  With no understood goal, it’s impossible to know whether you’re “winning” as a small group or not.  If you have no idea where you’re taking your group, now’s the time to figure that out.  Don’t wait another day.  Begin praying now, and talking with your group through it.  Then consistently work to accomplish that goal.

Without consistency, people don’t know what to expect.  Consistency allows trust to be build.  Trust encourages the group to speak truth into each others’ lives.  Speaking truth into each others’ lives spurs growth in godliness.  And a group growing in godliness is a healthy group.

How are you building consistency into your group time, without allowing things to grow stale?

 
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