Been Reed - Life and Theology. The musings of a young pastor.

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Smelling Salts Messed Me Up

September 29, 2011 / Ben Reed / 4 Comments

Photo credit: Creation Swap user Marian Trinidad

Once, a friend of mine ask me to take a whiff of some smelling salts. In order not to appear weak, I did.

Turns out those things are potent.

I got a headache that lasted for about an hour. And I can still, even right now, remember that smell so vividly that it gives me the chills.

These salts are meant for reviving ‘dead’ people. They leave a mark on you so significant that you’ll remember that smell for the rest of your life. When you hear someone talking about smelling salts, you’re taken right back to that moment when you smelled them.

The Mark of Love

And that’s what God’s mercy and love does to us. It wakes us up from death. It revives us from our slumber.

As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins, in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air… – Ephesians 2:1-2

We were held captive by our sin. Chained to our death.

But God’s love pulled us out of our slumber. Out of the mess. It woke us to the beauty offered in forgiveness and beckoned us with hope. God’s love said, “I know your past. I understand your heart better than you do. But I want you anyway.”

And I need that reminder. Every day I need it. Because my heart is prone to wander and doubt. It’s prone to forget even the most important Truth it could ever know: God knows me and still loves me.

I need to go back and smell the salts again. Remind myself of the potency of grace. Feel the chills of the salts one more time.

“Restore to me the joy of your salvation…” – Psalm 51:12

*Photo credit: Creation Swap (Marian Trinidad)

Oops…I just “churched”

September 28, 2011 / Ben Reed / 8 Comments

photo credit: Clarksville Now

I know that the word “church” isn’t grammatically an action verb.

But neither is the word “Facebook,” and we use it like it is.

“I’ll Facebook you later today…”

“What’s your name? Great…I’ll Facebook you!”

Neither is the word “Google,” but we verb it up, too.

“I have no idea what the population of Idaho is, so I’ll Google it.”

So can you give me a little leeway? Because last Saturday, I “churched.” By that, I mean I WAS the Church. I didn’t attend a mass. Or give my tithes. Or sit in a pew. I didn’t hand out welcome bulletins or greet new visitors.

I was “the Church” in action verb form.

On Saturday, I was a part of a mobilizing of people from Grace Community Church who worked to make a difference here in our city. We called it Operation Serve, and this is the 6th year we’ve done this. We worked in partnership with the city of Clarksville to send out over 1200 volunteers.

Some of us remodeled houses.

Some landscaped.

Some played with special needs children.

Others worked on projects with non-profits.

Did we serve because it’s the cool thing to do? Nope.

Did we serve because that’s what we were told we had to do? Nope.

We served because that’s what the Church does. The Church serves because we follow the lead of our Savior who served us. Our Savior who is in the business of making old things new again, righting wrongs, and healing the broken.

We served expecting nothing in return. We didn’t have a string attached to our hammers that said, “We will help if you _____.” We don’t serve so that we can get something in return, but because that’s what we were created to do. That’s who we are and how we love.

We serve because we’ve been served. We love because we’ve been loved. We give because we’ve been given much.

This Sunday, millions will gather to worship. They’ll “go to church.” And while that’s an important part of being a follower of Christ, we want to remind the world that we, the Church, don’t simply exist to gather in our own little huddles. The Church is here to make a difference in our community. To leave things better than we found it.

Last Saturday, we put our faith on display.

But someone will say, “You have faith and I have works.” Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works. – James 2:18

*Photo credit: Clarksville Now

Statistics, Decision-Making, & God

September 26, 2011 / Ben Reed / 10 Comments

I talked with a friend the other day who’s in his 50s. We were talking about a potential job opportunity on his table.

It was a significant step up in pay and influence. I asked him, “Why aren’t you strongly considering this?”

He responded with, “At my age, I can’t make a move like that. If I fail, I’ll have nowhere else to go. Statistics prove that people who have been in my position for as long as I have and transition to another church tend to only spend a couple of years there before they leave.”

There are two important words in what he said. “Statistics show…”

photo credit: Creative Commons License, user Mac Steve

Here’s my word of advice for anyone who uses that phrase:

Who cares what statistics show?!?

Statistics show

That everyone dies. But I’m not ready for that.
That more marriages end in divorce than stay the course. But I’m not going to quit fighting for the health of my marriage.
That I’ll be an absent dad. But I’m not going to let that happen.

Who cares what the statistics say? Not me. I’m not letting statistics hold me back.

I’m thankful that God isn’t limited by what statistics say has to happen.

God isn’t limited by statistics.

Gideon led an army of ~~22,000~~ 300 to conquer the Midianites (Judges 6-8). Against the statistics.
Moses led the Israelites out of slavery to the most powerful man in the world. With no weapons (Exodus 12:31-40). Against the statistics.
Daniel was thrown into a pit of lions and survived to be a leader for his exiled people (Daniel 6). Against the statistics.
David, a boy at the time, defeated the best warrior the the Philistines had (1 Samuel 17). Against the statistics.
Abraham and Sarah birthed a nation at the ripe old age of 100 (Genesis 21:1-7). Against the statistics.
Jesus had 12 followers that took the Gospel to the ends of the earth (Acts). Against the statistics.

Statistics don’t hold a candle to God.

I know that wisdom takes statistics into account. Statistics aren’t evil, but can help inform our decisions. We should take them into account. But we should not use them solely in our decision making.

Don’t let statistics determine your decision.

Remember that you serve a God who overcomes odds and breaks through strongholds. He won’t be stopped by a mere statistic.

Neither should you.

*photo credit: Creative Commons user: Mac Steve

3 free tickets to RightNow 2011

September 26, 2011 / Ben Reed / 22 Comments

I like you. I genuinely do.

Most of you I know personally because we’ve had conversations either online or in person.

And just to say, “Thanks,” I’d like to give you something.

The guys at Right Now are putting on a conference for lead pastors, student pastors, and young adult pastors. It’s also for anyone who is responsible for casting vision, leading people, and equipping people to serve.

And don’t forget that it’s for small groups pastors, discipleship pastors, assimilation pastors, and anyone responsible for carrying out the Church’s mission through Bible studies, discipleship, or groups.

Francis Chan, Matt Chandler, and Matt Carter will all be there. It’s really a premier conference.

The conference happens from November 2-4, 2011. More details HERE.

And I’ve got 3 tickets to give away! (1 ticket per person)

To enter, just do (at least) one of the following (1 point/action below):

1. Subscribe to this blog. By email click HERE (just follow the instructions…it’s really easy), or by RSS HERE.

2. Tweet or Facebook (or both) this, making sure to tag me: Want to score a free ticket to Right Now 2011? Check out @benreed ‘s blog here: http://ow.ly/6ELRF

3. “Like” Life & Theology on Facebook HERE.

4. You must leave a comment below, simply telling me how many of these you’ve done (1 for each of the above).

I’ll choose the winners via random.org on Friday, September 30th.

Good luck!

The 1st rule of Introducing Yourself

September 23, 2011 / Ben Reed / 7 Comments

Ever seen someone and you just can’t remember their name?

It’s embarrassing.

And if you’re in a position where you’re in front of a lot of people very often, likely there will be people who know your name, but you don’t know theirs. Still embarrassing.

I’ve got some things that I’m working on to help me better remember names, but I want to save embarrassment for others who aren’t working on it if that’s at all possible. So here’s my number one rule when I introduce myself:

Assmume nobody remembers my name.

Always assume someone has no idea who you are. (If they happen to remember your name, you’ll be pleasantly surprised!)

Then give them the context for how they know you.

Where did you meet? How long ago? Why should they know you? What’s the connection?

Assume they don’t know your spouse either. It’ll put them at ease, because if they don’t remember exactly they’ll be wracking their brain. If they have no recollection of who you are, this *rule* will help them tremendously. Trust me.

As soon as you act like someone should know who you are, you come across as a diva. And nobody wants to be a diva or talk to one.

So give people the easy road. Remind them of your name. And you’ll save everyone a little embarrassment and disappointment.

Question:

Are you good at remembering names?

Photo credit: Creative Commons user Bump

How to hold your Baby if you Need Both Hands Free to take a picture

September 22, 2011 / Ben Reed / 1 Comment

I know this is random, but I thought you’d enjoy the laugh.

(HT: 22 Words)

6 Reasons a “Yes” Man will Demolish Your Vision

September 22, 2011 / Ben Reed / 4 Comments

Creation Swap User Savannah Daniel

Having a team of people around you that agree with you on everything feels great in the moment. You feel like a king issuing awesomeness at every turn. Every idea, every decision, every complaint and every shout is greeted by a resounding, “Yes!” You can’t do anything wrong. Everybody wants to be you.

Little do you know, you may be leading your organization straight into the ground.

While I was in grad school, I called these guys, “lackeys.” Familiar with the term? A lackey is, formally, someone who does menial tasks or runs errands for another.” (Merriam-Webster) I define it as someone who is constantly at your beckon call. In grad school, these were the guys who wore suits to class every day and ran little errands around for the professor. It was pitiful, really. Everywhere the professor went, so did the lackey. These guys were little clones, thinking and teaching like their leader.

Every leader can find little “lackeys.” Every leader, however, should surround themselves with people who think and operate differently.

Because a “Yes” man just could demolish your vision.

6 Reasons a “Yes” man will Demolish your Vision

1. Maybe you need to hear, “No.”

For “no” – I can sometimes have some dumb ideas. Really dumb. And I need someone to say, “Nope. Move on. Start moving in a different direction.”

2. Maybe you need to hear, “Yes.”

I have a tendency to be pretty hard on myself. Yet sometimes my ideas are really good. And I need someone to come alongside me and encourage me with, “Yes, your’e headed in the right direction even though you may think you’re not.”

3. You need pushback on your ideas

I process things out loud, so I need someone who’s going to push back on my ideas and not just take them at face value because I said them. I need the occasional, “Why? Are you sure? Why now? Why him? Why not this?” Reminder to self: you’re not as great as you think.

4. Unity is not the same as conformity.

We should pursue unity, but that doesn’t have to be conformity. Unity means that we can operate together as a team even though we have differing ideas. Unity promotes healthy growth. Conformity can produce growth, but it can also lead to a cess pool of thoughts that never evolve and get better.

5. Commiserating can take you down a dangerous path.

Ever headed there? It starts out innocently. You’re tired and frustrated, so you vent to someone else. And instead of them saying, “Whoa…hang on. You’re pretty bitter and angry right now. Why don’t you take a breather and come back in a few minutes?” They say, “Whoa…you’re right. That’s awful. In fact, it’s worse than you thought. Let me tell you about ___.” If you’ve ever been there, you know that this is a slippery slope. “He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.” – Proverbs 13:20

6. “Leaders” are vital.

Leaders think for themselves and help the organization pursue what’s best for it. They don’t exist just to follow your leadership. They’re using the gifts God’s given them, and when they do that it is a thing of beauty for them and for you. Leaders produce leaders…followers do not. “Yes” men aren’t necessarily leaders. If you’ve only got followers in your organization right now, don’t expect them to produce, and attract, leaders.

Question:

Do you have people in your life that frustrate you because they always push back on your ideas?

*photo credit: Creation Swap user: Savannah Daniel

Pursuing God’s Love

September 21, 2011 / Ben Reed / 5 Comments

My friend, Margaret Feinberg (on Twitter HERE or Facebook HERE), just launched a new 6-week DVD Bible study series called “Pursuing God” with Zondervan. The first two titles are Pursuing God’s Beauty: Stories from the Gospel of John and Pursuing God’s Love: Stories from the Book of Genesis. Instead of me giving my thoughts on the study, I thought you might like to hear directly from Margaret.

Ben: Where did you come up with the idea for this series?

Margaret: I reached a place in my own spiritual life where I felt disconnected from God. I decided to return to the foundations of my faith by reading through the Book of Genesis. Something sparked as I studied, and so I continued reading and rereading for more than 18 months.

During that time, I kept hearing a reverberation in conversations with people around the country who were looking for a Bible study that wasn’t topical but rather based on a book of the Bible—allowing them to really dive deeper into the Scripture. But they admitted that either they or some of the members of their small groups don’t have time to tackle an hour of homework a night. So I began to develop a study that created an equal playing field for the veteran believer who had time to do 30-minutes of homework a night and the young mom who barely has time to take shower. Both can engage in this study—whether or not they’ve done the homework that week—and explore the Scripture together. The study encourages participants to not only grow deeper in relationship with God but with each other as they discuss and share life together.

Ben: What are some of the unique features that make these resources different from every other resource available for small groups?

Margaret: Pursuing God’s Beauty: Stories from the Gospel of John and Pursuing God’s Love: Stories from the Book of Genesis are six-session DVD Bible studies with each session averaging 18 minutes in length—leaving plenty of time for discussion and digging deeper into the Scripture and topics covered. Pursuing God’s Beauty is filmed in an artist’s loft with an artist painting in the background—the picture complete with the final session. Pursuing God’s Beauty is filmed outdoors in Colorado with rock climbers in the background. Each lesson features icebreaker questions as well as experiential activities, and five after-hours studies each week are provided in the participant’s guide for those who want to dive deeper into the Scripture at home.

Ben: What is it that you hope people would get out of these studies?

Margaret: Studying the Bible is more than something for ‘religious’ people and is more than something done in isolation. Through these studies, we’re reminded the Bible was meant to be discussed in community, and its stories are powerful enough to speak to each one of us—wherever we are and whatever our circumstances might be.

Ben: Why did you select Genesis as one of the book of the Bible to dive into?

Margaret: It’s amazing to think that everything we see and encounter in our world today—whether in a place like this with breathtaking views or in a more urban context all began in Genesis.

I love this book of the Bible, because Genesis is the story of our beginnings. In fact, the first word of the Bible in Hebrew is beresheet meaning “in the beginning”. This is the story of our origins, where we began, the formation of our cosmos and humanity. It is also the story of alienation from God, from each other, and from the creation. It’s is also the story of his loving initiative to redeem the world back to himself.

The Genesis story matters because in order to understand where we are today, we must go back to the beginning. The past helps us understand our present and illuminates our future.

Ben: In studying the Gospel of John, you invite readers to explore the beauty of God. Unpack that a little for us.

Margaret: Ultimately, you and I were designed to be captivated by God’s beauty. And when we pursue His beauty—we can’t help but find ourselves on a journey… to know more about God, His character, attributes, ways and work, in our world. And the miracle of this journey is that along the way we find breathtaking portraits of salvation, redemption, and restoration.

Perhaps no book of the Bible paints a clearer picture of this then the Gospel of John. Throughout the Gospel of John, the beauty of God radiates in the person of Jesus Christ—the one in whom God displayed his whole heart for the world to see. It’s within the person of Jesus that we find the invisible attributes of God being made visible, on display like the fine pieces of artwork in this gallery—to be enjoyed, celebrated, and reflected upon.

For more info, check out PursuingGodBibleStudy.com.

I’ll be giving away one copy of each of these studies. To be eligible to win, leave a comment, ReTweet, or share on Facebook. Make sure you tag me so I can add you to the drawing! Drawing will be held on Friday, September 23rd, at 9:00 pm.

Anticipating before listening

September 21, 2011 / Ben Reed / 8 Comments

iStock photo user: Fabervisum

Good leaders listen well. They don’t merely anticipate.

I was at the bank yesterday, and as I left I said to the teller, “Bye, see you later!” To which she replied, “I hope you have a good day, too!”

She anticipated because she had heard the same thing from every customer that day. She thought she heard, “Have a good day!” She should have listened more carefully.

Not a big deal, because the response that my bank teller makes to me on the way out doesn’t make or break my day, but it does point out an important principle.

Listen before you answer.

Listen before you answer…

When you’re talking with your spouse and you feel like you already know what they’re going to say
When you’re in a hurry and you wish the person would just hurry up
When you’re the small group leader and you’re “expected to have the right answer”
When someone is going to ask your advice
When someone is not going to ask your advice, they’re just sharing their story
When you’re talking with an “extra grace required” person
When you’ll be expected to give a response and you’re not sure what you’re going to say.

The temptation is to move ahead and prepare what your response will be. That way, you’ll appear smart and on top of things.

But you’re better off listening fully before processing your answer.

Those who are sharing their heart with you will feel honored and respected knowing you truly care about them.

And when they throw you a curve ball, like I did my bank teller, you’ll be ready.

He who answers before listening — that is his folly and his shame. – Proverbs 18:13

Question:

Have you ever tried to anticipate what someone was going to say, and gotten it wrong?

Have you ever had a conversation with someone when they appeared absent?

*photo credit, iStock Photo user: Fabervisum