Author: Ben Reed (page 16 of 86)

Serving as a small group

November 21, 2012 / / 0 Comments

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I attended the ReGroup conference at North Point this year. I decided to post some of the notes. To see all of them, click HERE.

Introduction

It’s clear in Scripture that God’s heart tips toward the orphan, the widow, the poor, the imprisoned, and the brokenhearted. But how – with the urgency of our weekly responsibilities – do we ensure that serving our community and showing compassion to those in need are priorities? And how do we make it simple for our groups? We will share how we’re learning to make this an integral part of our ministry.

I. How are compassion and service integrated into your church’s strategy?

A. We must manage the tension between serving as a ministry (what we do) and service as a value (how we do it).

  1. When serving becomes a ministry, we are learning to make it simple.
  2. When service is a value, we are making it a priority.
B. To gain long-term traction…
  1. Service must be anchored in the strategic language of your church. (at North Point, they often say, “Relationships fuel service and serving fuels relationships)
  2. You must have a mechanism for mobilizing people to serve.

II. What is the role of compassion and service in groups?

A. We must manage the tension between mobilizing groups to serve and equipping groups for effective service.
B. When we mobilize and equip, people will do good well.
C. We want to move people from awareness to engagement to identity. (see groupleaders.org/berich for an example of what they’re doing this season.)

III. How will you make serving a priority in your groups?

A. We must manage the tension between finding engaging service opportunities and meeting the real needs of our communities.
B. We partner; we don’t pioneer. To non-profits they say: We need you, and you need us.
  1. This allows us to leverage our resources to help our partners go further, faster.
  2. Partnering instead of pioneering multiplies our influence in the community.

Conclusion

Our mission is to point people to the One who transforms, and it is the most important mision in the world. Service is a catalyst to this transformation, and the transformation is multiplied when we serve in and as a community. As a result, it is incumbent upon us to equip and mobilize groups to serve in astrategic and helpful ways – to make it simple and make it a priority.
 

Developing a Small Groups Strategy

November 21, 2012 / / 0 Comments

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I attended the ReGroup conference at North Point this year. I decided to post some of the notes. To see all of them, click HERE.

Introduction

There is a road map you can follow when developing your small group ministry. In this breakout, we’ll talk about the key principles that form the framework of our small group strategy. And we’ll discuss how you can contextualize them to your adult ministry, regardless of the size.

I. Some contextual thoughts for developing a small groups strategy

A. Leading a small group is to developing a groups strategy as driving a car is to building a car. A car and a groups’ strategy are both systems. 

B. Every system is built of essential components.

  1. If you leave out an essential component, your system won’t work.
  2. If you don’t know what the essential components are, you won’t know why your system down’t work.
  3. For every essential component, there is a steering question to ask and a guiding principle to consider.
  • When you have better questions, you get better ideas.
  • When you have better ideas, you get better solutions.

C. The goal for today is to further your ability to develop and implement an effective groups strategy. 

D. We will achieve the goal through two tactics:

  1. Introduce the five essential components of a small groups strategy.
  2. Illustrate an expression of these components using the example of our model

II. The Five components of an effective small group strategy

A. Point leadership

  1.  Steering question: Who is empowered, responsible, and accountable for the success of our groups system?
  2. Our answer:
  3. Guiding principle: “First who, then what.” – Jim Collins, Good to Great

B. Establish clear wins

  1. Steering question: How is our groups’ strategy helping us accomplish our vision?
  2. Our answer: intimacy with God, community with insiders, influence with outsiders. Closeness and intimacy (closed model), vs connecting people quickly (open model)
  3. Guiding principle: Life change happens best in the context of a small group. People love to win!

C. Coaching structure

  1. Steering question: How are we providing real-time, tactical support to group leaders?
  2. Our answer: coaching provides vision, orientation, direction, and support.
  3. Guiding principle: coached leaders go further, faster

D. Leader development

  1. Steering question: How are we equipping leaders with the knowledge they need?
  2. Our answer: community group leader orientation, coaches meetings, early gathering, theopraxis
  3. Guiding principle: Teach less for more.

E. Assimilation Solution

  1. Steering question: How are we forming groups?
  2. Our answer: Group Link in January and August. At Athens church, they appoint people to small groups
  3. Guiding principle: Think steps, now programs.

Conclusion:

  1.  There is no such thing as “the thing,” that silver bullet that solves all small group problems.
  2. The strategy will only be as strong as the weakest component.
  3. The expressions may not be infinitely scalable; the questions are.
  4. Ask and answer these questions continuously.

 

 

Why I’m a small grouper for life

November 20, 2012 / / 2 Comments

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I attended the ReGroup conference at North Point this year. I decided to post some of the notes. To see all of them, click HERE.

Andy Stanley taught in this main session.

Leading a group is the hardest and the best thing that a volunteer at North Point can do.

The only numerical goal that they’ve set as a church is groups. The goals you set focus the attention and affection and resources of your church. The goal was to connect 100,000 people in groups. Because of that, it’s impacted how they’ve budgeted and staffed. Groups is central to their entire congregation.

They say this often:

Life change happens in circles not rows.

Andy Stanley started a small group because he couldn’t attend Sunday school. And his first groups experience as a couple wasn’t a part of a program. It was just a need that he knew he could meet.

However,

There are no perfect groups. Because people are there.

They have a closed groups model, and their secret to adding and growing groups is Group Link. This year they’ve connected over 6500 people in groups. 50% were new to small group life.

I’m not a small group lifer because:

  • I’ve learned so much in small group.
  • I like to connect with new people.
  • I’m expected to participate.
  • I look forward to Monday night.

I am a lifer because:

  • Group provides a relational first step for disconnect new or non believers.
  • It’s an environment where Sandra and u can nub user together and use our complementary gifts.
  • I’m faced with a variety of faith journeys that never fail to build my faith
  • Our children witness firsthand the importance of community.
  • We believe life change happens within the context of relationships.

North Point says this often:

Everybody needs to be in a group and when you’re ready, you need to lead a group.

 

Why circles are better than rows

November 20, 2012 / / 3 Comments

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I attended the ReGroup conference at North Point this year. I decided to post some of the notes. To see all of them, click HERE.

Andy Stanley kicked the conference off in his opening session.

He started off by saying

Your greatest investment in the local church may be in preparing the way for your child or grandchild. – Andy Stanley

He also dropped this jewel

The best thing you can do for your church is develop a groups strategy.  – Andy Stanley

8 Lessons why Circles are Better than Rows

A groups model frees adults to serve on the weekend. Sunday school is a system that doesn’t allow everyone to experience groups. I you’re serving, you can’t ge in a group. Now they want people to worship for an hour and serve for an hour.

1. A groups model provides an opportunity for everyone to participate in a group…even the staff.

If you are really committed to spiritual formation, you’ve got to have a system that allows everybody to participate. Vision/selling point: we want everyone to grow spiritually. We want everybody to be in circles, not just rows.

2. A groups model provides the optimal environment for care.

Relational care is far superior to pastoral care. Te most difficult situations are the ones where people are not connected. If you have a pastoral care problem in your church, the answer is not that you need more staff. You need more groups. Groups also allow students to serve younger students.
A groups model is a growth engine for the weekend services. The problem with on campus groups is that you have to basically double the size of your campus.

3. Groups allows you to double your capacity.

It’s easier to invite people to one hour programming than 2+ hours. 1 hour programming allows you to use a smaller facility to reach more people.

4. A groups model is far less expensive than an on campus classroom model.

When you do small groups in homes, you never run out of parking or space. Paying for babysitters is much cheaper than building a building. Not spending money on a building also allows you to spend resources on hiring staff, not paying for a building.
5. A groups model is a growth engine for connecting people.

With on-campus groups, you often find yourself not wanting to build a building big enough to connect that many people. And they won’t come because you don’t have anything for them. And the cycle continues.

6. A groups model allows us to deliver message content and critical information beyond rows and into circles.

This gives the chance to give content that you can’t deliver on Sunday morning. North Point calls this the ‘insider edition’ and they put it online and on DVDs they give to groups.

7. A groups model is a catalyst for identifying, enlisting, and developing leaders.

In the classroom model, teachers surface quickly. In groups, leaders surface quickly, because every group needs a leader.* If you care for people, you care for people.

The true Church is never facility dependent. And neither is it preacher dependent. Small groups open up tremendous opportunities to lead people to Jesus.

*25% of North Point staff served as an adult group leader before being hired.

 

 

 

Unengaged, Unreached North Africa

November 19, 2012 / / 0 Comments

We sent a team, under the leadership of my friend Parker Manuel, recently, to North Africa to a completely unreached, unengaged people group. People who have never heard the Gospel before, and whom no evangelical has made it a priority to engage with Truth.

Our Long Hollow team shot and edited this video. It gets me fired up for what God’s doing in North Africa, and how He’s going to use our folks to engage the unengaged, unreached peoples there!

Enjoy the video…and get fired up with me!

 

Pray for North Africa from Long Hollow Creative on Vimeo.

 

Small Groups, My Insecurities, & 9 Ways to Respond to the Quiet Guy

November 15, 2012 / / 8 Comments

I was in a small group my junior and senior years of high school that was absolutely monumental in my spiritual journey. That group helped me more than years and years of sermons I heard. More than years and years of sitting under a Sunday school teacher. More than years and years of individual study.Even though I didn’t talk much.

You know why I didn’t talk much during group time?

I was afraid.

I was afraid that I’d say something and be wrong.

Afraid I’d misquote a Scripture.

Afraid I’d say something and be disproven.

Afraid I’d say something dumb.

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image credit: Matt Gruber, Creation Swap, edits mine

There were a handful of times when I’d share something, only for someone to immediately respond with, “Well, why would you say this if ______ is true? What about the verse that says, “______.”

I’m sure that the guys saying these things weren’t trying to strike fear in me. Surely they weren’t intentionally trying to undercut every little step of faith I took to kick my fear in the teeth. They couldn’t be backhanding slamming my little serve across the net, like the guy that toys with you in ping pong, only to make you look silly with a flick of his wrist.

But every time I put myself out there, and they gave a quick retort, I retreated into my shell.

It’s a fear of man issue, I know. I’ve worked through it. I’ve dealt with my issues. I’m still dealing with them. I’m more and more comfortable being harshly corrected and chastised in a small group. My skin has toughened, and I’m more and more confident in who God has created me to be, rooting my identity in Christ. But here’s a word of wisdom to every small group leader:

Be careful how you respond to the quiet guy.

It’s easy to break people. Inadvertently, you squelch courage, winning the battle you didn’t even know existed. Winning the battle for the wrong team.

Instead of jumping all over the guy that says something you don’t agree with, let me offer a few responses you could give:

Helpful discussion engagers from a small group leader:

1. Hmm…that’s interesting. Can you explain that a little more?

2. Hmm…that’s interesting. Anybody else have a different take?

3. Thanks a ton for sharing that. We so value your perspective.

4. Good thought. Sounds like you’re pretty passionate about that. Where did you first hear that?

5. Thanks for that. I love the diversity of thought here.

6. Thanks for sharing. Let’s bounce that thought around the group.

7. But the Bible says, “_____,” so you’re wrong… (trust me, even if the person stands in stark contrast with the Bible, this is never, ever the best response right out of the gate)

8. I’ve not heard that angle before. Help me understand where you’re coming from.

9. So, let me try to repeat what you said so we can all be sure to understand your point…

There is a time for correction. A time for pointing out the Truth, and letting people choose to fall into the arms of Truth or run from them. There is a time for brutally honest feedback. But that time isn’t from you, the group leader, the “expert,” right after that person shares. Please don’t stomp out courage. Don’t cut off safety. Don’t snuff out curiosity.

And don’t kick the quiet guy.

Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits. – Proverbs 18:21

 

 

The Bloody Old Testament

November 7, 2012 / / 3 Comments

In my bible reading plan right now, I’m reading through the book of Leviticus. Which is usually the graveyard of well-intentioned Bible reading plans, right? How many times have you made it to Leviticus, gaining momentum every day you read, utterly inspired and broken by the Scriptures, only to get stopped dead in your tracks with Leviticus 1, verse 4?

So basically, Leviticus is like a State Trooper that parks on the side of the interstate behind a tree, ready to get you when you least expect it.

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image credit: University of Houston, Clear Lake

What I’ve found throughout the book, though, is that it’s bloody and nasty. There’s a lot of talk about blood entrails, and death. And there’s one reason for that: sin.

Your sin needed to be paid for by a sacrifice. In other words, your sin deserved death…either yours or something else’s. Because of this, there was a constant reminder of the nastiness and bloodiness and destructive nature of your sin.

Sneaking Some Sin In

When we ‘get away’ with a sin, we’re lulled into thinking that our sin isn’t that big of a deal. When you cheat a little and don’t get caught, you can think everything is ok. When you have a lustful thought, and nobody knows, you begin to devalue the powerful stranglehold that sin can have. You forget its potential for destruction.

Not so in the Old Testament system.

If you present a goat as your offering, bring it to the LORD, lay your hand on its head, and slaughter it in front of the Tabernacle. Aaron’s sons will then splatter the goat’s blood against all sides of the altar. – Leviticus 3:12-13, NLT

I have a 4 year old son. I can’t even imagine what kind of an impact witnessing an event like this would have on his life. It would absolutely scar him. Think of how violent this would be. The sights, the sounds (most animals don’t go “silently into the night”), the smells. The stench of death in the air that would hang around like a late-morning fog. The stain of blood on the hands and face of the priest. The residual stain of months, and years, of sacrifices made on the same altar. These sensory experiences don’t go in one ear and out the other. They stick with you, and mark you for life.

Loads of Hope

Reading through the Old Testament jogs us back to our senses about the weight of our sin. Sin destroys. And our sin deserves death. Every. Single. Time. Whether we’re caught or not. Whether we think we’ve slipped one through the cracks. Whether we see the path of burned trees we leave in our wake or not.

The flip side of that is even more true, for “where sin increased, grace abounded all the more.” (Romans 5:20)

The grace of God is beautiful. Not free. Not neat or clean. It is bought with blood and sweat and tears and pain. And it is gloriously beautiful.

Jesus paid our cost. His death leads to “justification and life for all men.” (Romans 5:18) That’s a reason to rejoice. And it’s worth saying again. Rejoice! (Re: Philippians 4:4) Jesus’ death pays for your sin no matter how far you’ve run. No matter how deep you’ve dug your hole. No matter how many people you’ve hurt or times you’ve fallen.

Be reminded of your stench. And the sweet smell of grace.

 

 

10 meeting rules every pastor should live by

November 2, 2012 / / 8 Comments

We pastors have a lot of meetings. A lot.

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image credit: flickr user universityymca

I should’ve included “How to lead meetings” in my list of things I wish seminary had taught me. Meetings end up eating the majority of many of my ministry days. Whether I’m meeting with current small group leaders, potential coaches, ministry team members, or random church members, I’m in meetings hours and hours each week.

I love people, which means that I don’t hate meetings. But I also value my time and theirs, and don’t want to waste my days and my life in pointless meetings. Throughout the 7 years or so I’ve been a pastor, I’ve learned a few things about meetings that may help save you some headaches.

10 Meeting Rules Every Pastor Should Live By

1. Always bring a notepad.

If you come without something to write on, it shows that you don’t really care about that meeting. If it were more important, you’d have something to jot notes down on.

2. Buying someone a cup of coffee makes them more likely to agree to lead a small group.

Call this a bit of manipulation if you want, but it works.

3. Always be on time.

I used to try to be early to every meeting, but I found that 10 extra minutes here or there was adding up. And that 10 extra minutes here or there that I recaptured helped me get caught up on email, make that phone call I hadn’t yet, or put the finishing touches on a project made those few minutes valuable to me. Be on time, and don’t shoot to be super early.

4. Make the sale in person.

If you’re going to recruit someone to lead a small group, or some key role, don’t do it over email. Don’t do it over the phone, or by text message. Make the ask in person.

5. Make meetings count.

People’s time is valuable…yours included. If you’re going to meet with someone, plan on recruiting them for something. Or pitching an idea their way. Or invest in them spiritually. Or something. Make a decision at every meeting you lead. Never walk out of a meeting with your only takeaway being “let’s meet again and decide ____.”

6. Don’t go in to a meeting blindly.

If you can help it, always know what you’re walking in to. Get a general understanding before you meet with someone.

7. Never meet alone.

Either bring along a leader you’re investing in and/or meet with multiple leaders at once. Relationships are key to leadership, and when you have more than one person at the table, relationships can be fostered.

8. Keep a to-do list handy at all times.

Don’t use napkins or the backs of receipts. You’ll lose them. Use a to-do list on your phone. I like Wunderlist and Things.

9. Check your email before you leave the house in the morning.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve shown up for an 8:00 meeting, only to realize that they emailed me the night before to tell me they couldn’t meet.

10. Shut it down.

I’ve got to shut things down when I get home. When I began in ministry, it consumed my life and my family. I’m getting better at shutting off, but I’m still a work-in-progress. Meetings and people are important, but so is your family. And so is your personal time. If you don’t recharge, you’ll have nothing to give in meetings.

Question:

Do you ever feel like your life is just one meeting after another?

 

 

10 Leadership Principles I Learned from Moving

October 30, 2012 / / 4 Comments

I moved this past weekend. Which means this was the most physically demanding, emotionally challenging, stressful and exciting weekends I’ve had in a long time.

Moving does that to you.

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image credit: simplemom.net

As always, there’s a lesson to learn around every corner. If you’re open, God can teach you something about yourself in just about any environment. Turns out, we can learn something from moving.

10 Leadership Principles I learned from Moving

1. You’re more effective with others.

Don’t try to move by yourself. That’s just dumb.

In leadership, don’t try to lead alone. That’s dumb, too.

2. Surround yourself with your friends.

If you enjoy the people you work with, you’ll be much more effective. If you can laugh together, you can weather the toughest of storms, too.

In leadership, it’s important to recruit people you enjoy spending time with. Your team will move further, faster, if you enjoy each other.

3. A little motivation goes a long ways.

I bought coffee and donuts for the guys helping me move. Caffeine and sugar work wonders, especially on a cold day. I call them “manna.”

In leadership, don’t overlook motivation and encouragement. People need to know they bring value to the table, that their ideas have merit, and that their role on the team is vital.

4. Work hard and take good breaks.

While we were moving, I made sure to take good breaks. Especially a good lunch break.

In leadership, help your team work in a rhythm. Work hard and play hard. After “playing,” you’ll find your team is much more motivated to work.

5. Invest in people.

The guys that helped me move were guys that I had invested a portion of my life into. They’d given much to me, too. When you invest yourself in people, they’ll be more than willing to help when things get overwhelming.

In leadership, don’t just lead out of positional authority. Lead out of the relationship you build with people as you invest your life, wisdom, and resources into who they are. Leadership based on position alone is weak leadership.

6. Ask for help.

You may think that this is just like #1 above, but it’s not. Asking for help takes a bit of humility.

In leadership, learn to ask for help. You’ll get better ideas, more buy-in, and more effectiveness as a team. “I’m not sure. What do you think?” is a great way to get that ball rolling.

7. Planning is crucial.

We had to pack our entire house in a moving pod. If we just threw boxes and furniture in at random, it would’ve never fit.

In leadership, planning events and initiatives in advance ensures you have the right people at the table, the right ideas implemented, and goals reached. Develop a 3 month, 6 month, 12 month, and 24 month plan. Spend 80% of your planning effort on the 3 month plan. 10% on the 6 month plan. 10% on the 12 & 24 month plans (combined) (via Steve Gladen)

8. The leader sets the pace.

When we were moving, if I slowed down, everybody else did, too. If I powered through, everybody followed.

In leadership, you set the pace. If you put your nose to the grind, you’ll find your team doing the same. If you celebrate well, your team will, too. If you’re lazy, your team won’t pick up your slack like you’d hope.

9. Working hard and leading aren’t the same thing.

I had to step back from doing the work of moving and be certain I directed people to take the right boxes, load the right things, and ensure we were moving efficiently.

In leadership, don’t constantly have your nose to the grind. Be sure you’re stepping back to lead, not just do. Your team needs to have direction and high-level leadership, not just another worker. Someone needs to direct, advise, and make quick decisions. That’s the job of the leader.

10. Don’t forget the attic.

We were almost done packing, when someone said, “Hey, what about the attic?” Stupid attic.

In leadership, know that you’ll forget something. Some detail will be overlooked, an idea will fall through, or a deadline will be missed. It’s ok. Build some margin in to plan for rainy days and times you won’t hit your intended goal. Know that you’re not perfect. Remind your team that it’s okay to mess up. When you do, pick up the pieces and move on.

Pastors: the Gospel we proclaim deserves the best, most effective leadership, right?

Question:

When was the last time you moved?

 

6 Reasons I Love the Church

October 24, 2012 / / 2 Comments

I love parachurch ministries. (ministries like Campus Crusade For Christ, Lifeway, Hope Pregnancy Center, etc.) They play such an important role in the kingdom, coming alongside the church in a beautiful way to serve our communities. I’ve done ministry with parachurch organizations, served on leadership boards, and pointed countless people to them as viable, vital organizations.

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image credit: Creation Swap user pru lee

But I have distinctly chosen not to work at a parachurch. I have nothing bad to say against them. Nothing at all. But I understand where God’s called me to lead and serve, and it’s in a local church.

Recently I sat down with the VP at a large Christian organization, and he pitched me a job offer. It was a sweet gig, and the twist he threw my way was, “This is the chance to serve not just one, but to serve thousands of local churches through your work here.” It caused me to take a step back and evaluate who I was and what God was calling me to.

In the process, I realized how much I love the local church. I saw just how much I adore the local expression of the body of Christ. I received a renewed passion for this beautiful, hot mess of a bride that Jesus died for.

6 reasons I love the church

 1. It’s messy.

Local church work isn’t neat and tidy. Ever. If it grows clean, that means you’re not doing the work of evangelism…or you’re disengaged from real ministry. Real ministry with real people who have real problems is a mess. And I’ve found that when people are open and honest with where God has them, the doubts and frustrations they’re experiencing, and the places where they’re most confused, spiritual growth happens in huge ways.

Neat and tidy is boring.

2. It’s not a formula.

There is no one-size-fits-all system. There is no perfect structure. No ministry without hiccups. You can learn principles from other churches, but copying methodology doesn’t work. What worked in one church likely won’t work in another.

Formulas are boring.

3. It’s not a bunch of “professionals.”

Pastors are not “professionals.” We are on the journey with those we are leading, broken people leading broken people. We are redeemed sinners leading people to the King. I’m thankful that I am free to be who God has created me to be, not masking over the parts of my life I’d rather stay hidden. It’s time for pastors to stop hiding behind beautiful masks.

“Professional” is boring.

4. It’s chaotic.

Church world not always chaos, but ministering to and with real people is edgy. You can’t box ministry in, because the moment you do, you’ll find that the box has moved. Chaos is scary and uncontrollable…ripe ground for faith to grow.

Controlled boxes are boring.

5. The work is never done.

No matter what you do, who you “fix,” what system is just “perfect,” there will always be more work to do. And I love that. There are challenges everywhere you look. And everybody is a work in progress. Pastors included. Sunday is always coming.

Completion is boring.

6. We are the bride of Christ.

Christ died for us! The local church was worth the blood of Christ. The local church, that messy, chaotic, unprofessional, constantly-needing-fixed, uncontrollable, beautiful bride, is worth every ounce of effort I can give.

The bride of Christ is not boring.

Question:

Do you work in/serve the local church? What do you love so much about your church?

 

 
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