Lance Armstrong and the spiral of deceit

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Lance Armstrong and the spiral of deceit

benlreed — January 17, 2013 — 8 Comments

image credit: ESPN

Lance Armstrong will announce to the world tonight that he used performance enhancing drugs as part of his run to dominate the cycling world. You may or may not think that cheating at cycling is a big deal. I get it. National exposure for cheating at a niche sport is pretty weird, right? Probably not enough to get national exposure and receive the kind of press that it’s received.Until you consider that Lance is a hero outside of the racing world. See, Lance contracted testicular cancer at age 25. Left untreated, it spread throughout his body, and he had a massive, very public, battle with cancer. Knowing not whether he would live or die, he launched the LiveStrong Foundation, and began advocating and fighting for the life of people stricken with cancer. LiveStrong has done tremendous work in the area of cancer research.

But Lance has learned what many of us have learned. As he covered up his cheating by lying about his steroid use, he had to lie even more. Sin compounded sin compounded sin. The more people he deceived, the more people he had to deceive as he spiraled downward.

Sin loves to hide itself behind layers of more sin.

Lance lied publicly and privately. As people questioned his actions, he went after them, publicly and privately. In the public courts and the courts of public opinion, Lance trampled on people as they called his integrity into question. Threatening phone calls, law suits, and nasty emails were sent to try to “disprove” Lance’s guilt.

The Reaction To Confrontation

Which is no shock to us, right? When you’re called out for something you’ve done, you tend to not react so positively, right?

Sin has a way of masking itself. With masks on top of masks. The deeper you go, the deeper you have to go. The more people you deceive, the more you have to continue to deceive.

In Scripture, King David knew this, too. (see 2 Samuel 11) He saw a beautiful girl, and he wanted her. So he summoned Bathsheba to his quarters, and slept with her. He sent her home, only to soon find out she was pregnant. So to cover up his sin, he decided to pull her husband, Uriah, home from the war. He got Uriah drunk, and urged him to go home and sleep with his wife, hoping to cover up his sin by leading everyone to believe Uriah had gotten Bathsheba pregnant. Sin covering sin.

Uriah didn’t take the bait.

So David had Uriah sent to the front lines of the war so he would be killed. David had Uriah killed to cover his sin.

Adultery, murder, lying and deceit.

You know what broke the cycle? Nathan, the prophet, confronted David on his sin.

David was absolutely broken. He confessed his sin and received forgiveness. He was completely open with God about his rebellion and need for grace. He admitted he’d messed up in a big way. And you know what the crazy thing was? God heard David, answered him, and restored to him joy!

Finding Hope

Maybe you’re on that spiral right now. You’ve messed up, and very few people know. You’ve got your public persona…and your private persona. And you don’t like that. I know you don’t. It’s not making you happy, and you’re scared to death of the consequences that your exposure could bring.

To stop the spiral, you’ve got to take off the mask. Live life freely in transparency, confession, and ample portions of grace. Quit pretending, quit hiding, and quit living life in fear. Quit acting like everything’s ok, because it’s not. God longs to restore joy to you, and free you from the chains that you’ve shackled yourself with.

Sin loves to hide itself behind layers of more sin. And that cycle won’t stop by itself. In fact, If you want to break that cycle, take a cue from David. Then bask in grace, and be quick to give it away.

If you want to have true joy and true freedom, it’s time to be honest.

Was David’s life easier once he confessed? Nope. In fact, he still had a long, hard road ahead. But it was a brighter, more hopful, more full road than the dark path he was sprinting down.

The road to healing isn’t easy. But your moment of exposure and fleeting shame will lead to a lifetime of restoration and love from our Savior.

Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and make me willing to obey you.

Then I will teach your ways to rebels,

and they will return to you.

Forgive me for shedding blood, O God who saves;

then I will joyfully sing of your forgiveness.

Unseal my lips, O Lord,

that my mouth may praise you. – Psalm 51:12-15

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In Theology confession, cover up, dishonesty, forgiveness, grace, hope, joy, lance armstrong, lying, restoration, sin, steroids

image credit: CreationSwap user Paule Patterson, edits mine

6 Social Media Rules Every Pastor Should break

benlreed — July 5, 2012 — 7 Comments

There are lots of social meda “rules” that form over time. Just as with any product or service, usage often determines the unspoken set of ground rules. And if you’re not careful, those “rules” can pigeon-hole you.

And nobody likes a pigeon hole. Well, nobody but pigeons.

image credit: CreationSwap user Paule Patterson, edits mine

Whether you’re a pastor that’s a casual user or a power user, a rookie or a veteran, there are certain rules that you should adhere to. Rules that will help you with engagement…and help you not come across as

1. Completely out of touch with culture.

2. A self-centered self-promoter.

3. A person that others unfollow when they read your updates.

So here are 6 rules that every pastor should break daily with social media.

6 Rules Pastors Should Break

1. Only quote the Bible

We know that you’re in love with the Bible. We get it. But there’s got to be more to who you are than random quotes from Scripture, right? Didn’t Martin Luther say anything good? CS Lewis? Can’t you come up with anything worth saying that’s at least remotely original? How about reading your Bible and applying it…and making that an update?

2. Keep up your “professional pastor” persona.

You’re not a walking Christian zombie, are you? You don’t only read Christian books, only watch Christian movies, and only eat at Christian restaurants, do you? There has got to be more to you than the Christian subculture. Building relationships with those outside of the faith isn’t going to happen if you’re tweeting YouTube videos out like this one, of Michael W Smith from the late 80s. Gotta love the vest. I think the song should’ve gone, “Nobody knew I could rock a vest like this…”

3. If you’re frustrated, complain. A lot.

Twitter can become a megaphone for you to voice your complaints about a lot of things: culture at large, politics, “other” pastors, or even your own church. Complaining doesn’t become you, though. In fact, Paul urges us

Don’t grumble about each other, brothers and sisters, especially on Twitter… – James 5:9 (additions mine)

4. Never update during “work” hours.

Give people an inside peek into who you are and what you do during your normal day. A behind-the-scenes, if you will. Social media can be a great voice for Truth and engagement throughout your week. Don’t have time to update during your work day? Schedule updates when you’ve got a few minutes.

5. Never share personal information.

Bologna. Share who you are. Share what you value. Talk about your family. Talk about your struggles. Share your pain. Your joy. Your victories.

6. Only follow other Christians.

If pastors want to bring hope to the hurting, grace to the downtrodden, and Truth to the places where people engage, we’ve got to track along with those outside of our Christian bubbles. And here’s a freebie for you…nobody judges your theology by who you follow on Twitter and Facebook.

Question:

Do you interact more on Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn, or on your blog?

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In Church, Social Media, Theology bible, grace, hope, pastor, rules, social media, truth

The Burning Plow

benlreed — July 2, 2012 — Leave a comment

I had the chance to speak yesterday at Grace Community Church, where I serve on staff.

As I looked through the life of Elijah and the calling of Elisha, the heart of my message was this:

Doing what’s right doesn’t always feel right, and many times when you do what’s right, it won’t make sense to everyone else.

If you’ve not heard the story of Elisha’s calling to ministry, it’s one of the most dramatic in all of Scripture.

The Burning Plow from Gcomchurch Sermons on Vimeo.

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In Church, Videos 1 kings 19, burn plow, calling, elijah, elisha, hope, sermon, vocational ministry, will of god

7 Truths about encouragement I learned from the gym

benlreed — April 11, 2012 — 4 Comments

I started working out at the gym a couple of months ago. CrossFit is my deal. I find it much more enjoyable…ahem…as *enjoyable* as lifting weights can be.

It’s a combination of lifting weights, aerobic activities (running, rowing, etc.), jumping/climbing, and gymnastics-type moves. Whereas normal weight-lifting can get boring through repetitive movements, I’ve never once been bored.

I’ve also never once gone home not sore.

As I was finishing up one of my runs just the other day, rounding the last corner before the mile run was over, I was about to go into cruise control. The last 400 meters were going to be easy, I thought. I was a sizable distance behind the next runner, and…who cares? It’s just a run…I don’t have to win this.

image credit: Creative Commons, user ConvergingPhoto

Until one of the coaches barked a word of encouragement my way.

I didn’t see it coming. I had already pushed the cruise button. I had taken my foot off the gas and was ready to coast. But the coach jarred me back to the grind. When I was tempted to coast, I was reminded to work even harder.

There have been a number of times where I’ve been directly encouraged. Sometimes it’s been in a cheerleading-type, “Way to go!” way. Other times it’s been a more constructive, “If you’ll just change ____, things will be easier” way.

In the process, I’ve learned much about how encouragement works.

7 truths about encouragement

1. Encouragement speaks things into existence that are not yet.

Am I good at working out? I don’t know…ask my stick arms. But they won’t be stick arms forever. Encouragement sees things that will be, based on trajectory instead of current circumstances. It focuses on potential, not only current reality.

2. Encouragement breeds hope.

When I’m ready to quit, a word of encouragement gives me a burst of energy. It breathes a bit of life into my fatiguing body. Encouragement is the breeding ground for hope, where none currently exists.

3. Encouragement builds relationships.

I feel a closer connection with those that have given me a timely encouragement. I feel like they believe in me when I didn’t even believe in myself. And I’m convinced that relationships are an under-valued key in so many areas of life. Especially decision-making.

4. Encouragement propels you further, faster.

I felt a surge of adrenaline when I heard, “You can do it, Ben!” When you encourage someone, your words help carry someone a little further. Even when you’re trying to climb a couch.

5. Encouragement tells you what can be.

Encouragement tells me that I could be better than I am right now. That I could run a bit faster. Lift a bit more. And not give up. Encouragement helps close the gap between the deficiencies you see in yourself right now and the picture of who you could be in the future.

6. Encouragement communicates, “I believe in you.”

Everyone needs to hear this. You need to know that someone else sees the same vision you do. Someone else believes you can close that gap. Someone else believes you can produce more, and become the better version of you that God intended.

7. I don’t always want encouragement.

Strange and twisted, no? Sometimes, I just want to give up. My body’s tired and my mind is mush. I’d rather throw in the towel for the day. But when I press through, I find potential that I didn’t know existed. “When you feel like you’ve used every ounce of energy you possess, you’ve still got extra reserve you can draw on,” my friend told me. Turns out he was right. And I hated him for it.

You’re an influencer of someone. Maybe you’re a pastor. Or a banker. Or a small group leader. Or a dad. Or a coach.

Those you lead can’t continue to do what God’s called them to do without a timely word of encouragement. Daily.

You’re also influenced by someone. Maybe your pastor. Or your banker. Or your small group leader. Or your dad. Or your coach.

Those who lead you can’t continue to do what God’s called them to do without a timely word of encouragement. Daily.

Time to put this on your to-do list.

Genuine encouragement is a gift you can give.

But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called “Today,” so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness. – Hebrews 3:13

Question:

Who needs your encouragement today?

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In Leadership, Theology daily, encouragement, exercise, hope, life, theology

The 1 thing every leader needs to hear

benlreed — November 23, 2011 — 6 Comments

photo credit: creation swap user Drew Palko

I meet with leaders regularly. Mostly, those are small group leaders at Grace, where I’m on staff.

Nearly every leader struggles with feelings of insecurity about their leadership (I put myself in that boat, too). It’s just part of living life as a broken, fallible human trying to lead people.

Leaders wonder

whether our upcoming decision is the right one.
whether the decision we just made was the right one.
if we’re strong enough for the job.
if we’re pleasing the right people.
whether we’re being successful.
whether we’re the right person for the job.

Leaders say

It’s too tough
I’m too busy
People aren’t responding
I still have so much in my life I need to work on
I don’t know enough
I haven’t experienced enough
I’m in over my head
There are better leaders out there
I’m not the best leader available
Do you know my past?

If all leaders, at some level, struggle with insecurity, then all leaders need to hear these words spoken to them:

You can do this.

Moses and Joshua

When Moses was about to die, he knew he needed to pass the baton of leadership for the people of Israel. There was a huge task in front of the Israelites, and they needed a strong leader. Moses knew it wouldn’t be him (we learn this from Numbers 20:12) In Deuteronomy 31:1-8, we see Moses addressing the Israelites in preparation for his coming death. After addressing the people, he called Joshua to him and we read this:

“Then Moses summoned Joshua and said to him in the sight of all Israel, ‘Be strong and courageous, for you shall go with this people into the land…”

Joshua was taking on a huge responsibility, following the greatest leader that the nation of Israel had known. I can only imagine the feelings of insecurity that were coursing through Joshua in that moment. A confirmation from Moses was what Joshua, this young leader, needed. He needed to hear from another leader, “You can do this.”

Moses told Joshua that he believed in him. He believed that Joshua was the man for the job. He believed that Joshua had what it took to get the job done. Not on his own, of course…”it is the Lord who goes before you.” (Deuteronomy 31:8) In fact, this was so important that Moses affirmed Joshua “in the presence of all Israel.” Joshua needed this encouragement and affirmation.

Encouraging another leader

Every leader needs to hear this from another leader. They need to hear, “You can do this” from someone they respect. They need to hear this from you. It’s vital to their continued growth.

If this is so important, how can you honestly and helpfully encourage and affirm another leader?

Listen to them. Ask good questions. Look to affirm the work they’ve been doing, and speak hope into them. You’ve been where they are, and you’ve had the feelings of insecurity they’re having. Give them these 4 words:

You can do this.

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In Leadership, Theology affirm, biblical, encourage, hope, joshua, Leadership, moses, young leader

A curious thing about worry

benlreed — November 17, 2011 — 5 Comments

photo credit: Creation Swap User James Cronin

Worry is a curious thing.

We think we can buy our way out of it.

We think we can think our way out of it.

We think we can outlast it.

We think we can out will-power it.

We think we can beat it.

But in the end, it will beat you.

In the end, it will destroy you.

In the end, it won’t give up.

In the end, it will dominate every area of your life.

In the end, it will leave you afraid.

In the end, you’ll be its slave.

Worry withers under the burden of Hope.

And if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith? – Jesus (Matthew 6:30)

* Photo credit: Creation Swap user James Cronin

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In Theology bible, hope, truth, worry

Shepherding Realities

benlreed — November 9, 2011 — 4 Comments

image via iStock Photo user IB

Self-perceptions are more spoken into existence by others than they are self-taught.

Don’t believe me?

Why do you think that some kids feel awkward? It’s because they’re told that they are.
Why do some kids feel un-loved? Because they’re told that they never measure up.
Why do some leaders perceive themselves to be weak? Because everyone tells them that they are.
Why do some wives feel like they never measure up? Because they’re never told that their work investing in their homes is worth the effort.
Why do some older people feel like they have no life and wisdom to give? Because they’re devalued by those who claim to love them.

We speak perceptions into existence every day through conversations and interactions we have with coworkers, family members, and the annoying guy at the drive-thru. The words, tone, and attitude you share with others can literally change the way that others view themselves.

I am speaking my son’s reality into existence every day: I tell him that he’s courageous. And strong. And that he’s a leader. And that nothing can hold him back. And that God’s going to use him in big ways. And that my love of him is secure. He can’t do anything to lose it.

Speaking Realities in Leadership

Want to lead someone? Then change their perceptions of themselves. The Bible calls this ‘encouragement.’ Encourage even the smallest step in the right direction. As you feed the work of God in someone’s life, people see where God is working. Your encouragement acts as a new set of glasses, changing the way they see everything. As you encourage with love, people feel loved. As you encourage with grace, people feel graced. As you encourage people with hope, despair melts away. Negative perceptions are overcome with a timely word and action.

Without your encouragement, though, they’re going to continue feeling an absence of love and grace and motivation. Without your encouragement, they won’t know which direction to head.

Encouragement focuses not on what is, but on what could be.
Encouragement focuses not on past failures, but on future hopes.
Encouragement focuses not on current shortcomings, but on timeless Truth.
Encouragement focuses not on overwhelming fear, but on a big God.
Encouragement focuses not on weaknesses, but on gifts and strengths.

Through encouragement, you have the chance to shepherd a person’s reality of themselves.

Correction may be warranted at times, but right now, just point out the bright spots. Help them see what you see.

There’s someone in your life right now that needs encouragement. Let them hear it from you today.

And we urge you, brothers and sisters, warn those who are idle and disruptive, encourage the disheartened, help the weak, be patient with everyone. – 1 Thessalonians 5:14

*image via iStock photo user: IB

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In Theology bible, encourage, hope, life

No more daydreaming

benlreed — October 24, 2011 — 9 Comments

They said, “Men of Galilee, why do you stand looking up into heaven? This Jesus, who has been taken from you into heaven, will come in the same way that you have seen Him going into heaven.” – Acts 1:11

photo credit: Creation Swap user Jared Rarick

I don’t know what your situation looks like right now. Maybe it’s bleak. Maybe it’s tough. Maybe there’s no hope, and you don’t know what your next step needs to be. Maybe your plans, and where you want to be in life, haven’t panned out.

Maybe you are undervalued, overworked, and underpaid. Maybe you aren’t appreciated at home. Maybe your “best” still isn’t good enough.

In these moments, it’s easy to wish our life away. It’s easy to complain, sulk, and be angry that life’s not how we want it to be.

And if you find yourself wishing your life away, do you know what’ll happen? You’ll wish it away. Life will pass you by, and you’ll be caught for years just staring into outer space, going nowhere.

That’s what the men in Acts 1:11 were doing. They were staring up into the sky, frozen and ready to wait right there until Jesus returned. They were completely unproductive and unmotivated. They had watched Jesus teach and heal, then be crucified on a cross. He died, was buried, then resurrected and ascended to heaven. They had placed their hopes on Jesus, and he’d left them. I can expect that they were frustrated, confused, and worried. Their Hope and their Promise was gone.

And the problem was that before Jesus would return there was still work to do.

Don’t get caught daydreaming your way out of where you are. Don’t want things to just be over. God’s got work for you to do now. People to invest in and gifts to give. Missions to fulfill and communities to transform. Relationships to heal and hope to give.

There Ain’t No Easy Way Out

Quit looking for the easy way out. Maybe there’s not one. Maybe God’s not going to swoop in and supernaturally make life easy for you. Maybe His plan isn’t to heal you of that disease. Maybe His plan isn’t to reconcile that relationship. Maybe His plan isn’t to make you financially secure.

Maybe, though, just maybe…His plan is to comfort you through it. And give you hope and mercy and grace. And use you to breath life and hope into someone else. (2 Corinthians 1:3-7)

Question: Ever been caught daydreaming?

*Photo credit: Creation Swap user Jared Rarick

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In Theology bible, daydreaming, God, grace, hope, mercy

7 Steps to Prepare & Deliver a Funeral Sermon

benlreed — October 12, 2011 — 8 Comments

Photo credit: Creation Swap user Krist Adams

I realize that some of you have never delivered a funeral sermon, and perhaps you never will.

But I also know that, at just the thought of delivering a funeral sermon, others of you will begin to get the sweaty-palm. Your heart beats a little faster at the thought of having to stand in front of a casket to deliver words that convey hope and life in a room full of death. And though you may not be able to envision ever having to preach a funeral sermon, I can almost guarantee you that you’ll have the opportunity at some point in your life.

In my short tenure as a pastor, I’ve unfortunately been asked to preach many funeral sermons. I say “unfortunately” because I don’t thoroughly enjoy the heaviness. Even so,through meeting with families, weeping with them, getting to know somebody that I will never physically know, and communicating hope in the midst of pain, I’ve learned a lot about preparing and delivering a funeral sermon.

Having a system in place is incredibly important. Without a system, you won’t know the next step to take when you get the call that says, “____ has just passed away, and I want you to preach at the funeral…”

Preparing and Delivering a Funeral Sermon

Meet with the family.

Weep with them. Ask questions that help them recall the good memories. In the process, take note of stories and defining marks in their lives. Try this question:

If you could describe _____ in one word, what would it be?

Capture stories.

As the family is describing their loved one, feverishly take notes. Capture details from stories so you can better understand the life and legacy of the loved one.

Use this as a guiding question: What did _____ do as a hobby/for fun?

Find humor.

Listen for funny stories. If the family doesn’t offer any, ask for some. Likely, the family is sitting on them, not sure if they really have the freedom to share something funny in a setting like this. Humor (that maintains dignity and honor for the deceased) helps break the heavy tension of the service.

Try these guiding questions: Do you have any funny stories from ______’s life? What were some of _______’s nicknames?

As much as you can, incorporate the family’s wishes into the service.

I say “as much as you can,” because it could be that the family asks you to do something that contradicts your value system. But consider asking this:

Is there a verse, a quote, or a song that you would like incorporated into the service?

During the service, connect positive characteristics with a story from the person’s life.

Pick three or four defining positive characteristics of the loved one that you gathered from your conversation with the family and present them each with a story (or two). This helps paint a picture of a person’s life for those who didn’t know them as well, and it reminds family and friends of the good times.

Be honest, but not hard.

It’s okay to be honest in your sermon, but don’t use it as a time to bash the deceased, even if the family relationships were difficult or the person was an unbeliever. First of all, it’s not your place. Secondly, it’s not becoming. Ever.

Give hope.

Everybody in the room is focused on death, so utilize this as a time to connect people with the truth that this life is short, and the Gospel is the only hope of eternity with Jesus. If you don’t land here, you’ll leave people dry and miss out on a great opportunity to share true hope with hurting people.

Question: Have you ever had to give a funeral sermon? What did I leave out?

*I’ve also mapped out how I go about laying out a marriage sermon HERE.

* Photo credit: Creation Swap user Krist Adams

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In Church biblical, funeral sermon, hope, humor

Love & Fire

benlreed — September 6, 2011 — 2 Comments

Creative Commons: Will G

Love is a lot like fire.

The more you give, the more it grows.

Come to think of it, so is

grace
hope
mercy
generosity
acceptance
joy
peace
truth

Try to hoard any of these, and the flame goes out. For you and for others.

Share them copiously, and you’ll see the blaze take over your life.

What good is it, my brothers, if a man claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save him? – James 2:14

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In Theology fire, grace, hope, love, mercy

Life and Theology

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