I like you. I genuinely do.

Most of you I know personally because we’ve had conversations either online or in person.

And just to say, “Thanks,” I’d like to give you something.

The guys at Right Now are putting on a conference for lead pastors, student pastors, and young adult pastors. It’s also for anyone who is responsible for casting vision, leading people, and equipping people to serve.

And don’t forget that it’s for small groups pastors, discipleship pastors, assimilation pastors, and anyone responsible for carrying out the Church’s mission through Bible studies, discipleship, or groups.

Francis Chan, Matt Chandler, and Matt Carter will all be there. It’s really a premier conference.

The conference happens from November 2-4, 2011. More details HERE.

And I’ve got 3 tickets to give away! (1 ticket per person)

To enter, just do (at least) one of the following (1 point/action below):

1. Subscribe to this blog. By email click HERE (just follow the instructions…it’s really easy), or by RSS HERE.

2. Tweet or Facebook (or both) this, making sure to tag me: Want to score a free ticket to Right Now 2011? Check out @benreed ‘s blog here: http://ow.ly/6ELRF 

3. “Like” Life & Theology on Facebook HERE.

4. You must leave a comment below, simply telling me how many of these you’ve done (1 for each of the above).

I’ll choose the winners via random.org on Friday, September 30th.

Good luck!

 

My friend, Margaret Feinberg (on Twitter HERE or Facebook HERE), just launched a new 6-week DVD Bible study series called “Pursuing God” with Zondervan. The first two titles are Pursuing God’s Beauty: Stories from the Gospel of John and Pursuing God’s Love: Stories from the Book of Genesis. Instead of me giving my thoughts on the study, I thought you might like to hear directly from Margaret.

Ben: Where did you come up with the idea for this series?

Margaret: I reached a place in my own spiritual life where I felt disconnected from God. I decided to return to the foundations of my faith by reading through the Book of Genesis. Something sparked as I studied, and so I continued reading and rereading for more than 18 months.

During that time, I kept hearing a reverberation in conversations with people around the country who were looking for a Bible study that wasn’t topical but rather based on a book of the Bible—allowing them to really dive deeper into the Scripture. But they admitted that either they or some of the members of their small groups don’t have time to tackle an hour of homework a night. So I began to develop a study that created an equal playing field for the veteran believer who had time to do 30-minutes of homework a night and the young mom who barely has time to take shower. Both can engage in this study—whether or not they’ve done the homework that week—and explore the Scripture together. The study encourages participants to not only grow deeper in relationship with God but with each other as they discuss and share life together.

Ben: What are some of the unique features that make these resources different from every other resource available for small groups?

Margaret: Pursuing God’s Beauty: Stories from the Gospel of John and Pursuing God’s Love: Stories from the Book of Genesis are six-session DVD Bible studies with each session averaging 18 minutes in length—leaving plenty of time for discussion and digging deeper into the Scripture and topics covered. Pursuing God’s Beauty is filmed in an artist’s loft with an artist painting in the background—the picture complete with the final session. Pursuing God’s Beauty is filmed outdoors in Colorado with rock climbers in the background. Each lesson features icebreaker questions as well as experiential activities, and five after-hours studies each week are provided in the participant’s guide for those who want to dive deeper into the Scripture at home.

Ben: What is it that you hope people would get out of these studies?

Margaret: Studying the Bible is more than something for ‘religious’ people and is more than something done in isolation. Through these studies, we’re reminded the Bible was meant to be discussed in community, and its stories are powerful enough to speak to each one of us—wherever we are and whatever our circumstances might be.

Ben: Why did you select Genesis as one of the book of the Bible to dive into?

Margaret: It’s amazing to think that everything we see and encounter in our world today—whether in a place like this with breathtaking views or in a more urban context all began in Genesis.

I love this book of the Bible, because Genesis is the story of our beginnings. In fact, the first word of the Bible in Hebrew is beresheet meaning “in the beginning”. This is the story of our origins, where we began, the formation of our cosmos and humanity. It is also the story of alienation from God, from each other, and from the creation. It’s is also the story of his loving initiative to redeem the world back to himself.

The Genesis story matters because in order to understand where we are today, we must go back to the beginning. The past helps us understand our present and illuminates our future.

Ben: In studying the Gospel of John, you invite readers to explore the beauty of God. Unpack that a little for us.

Margaret: Ultimately, you and I were designed to be captivated by God’s beauty. And when we pursue His beauty—we can’t help but find ourselves on a journey… to know more about God, His character, attributes, ways and work, in our world. And the miracle of this journey is that along the way we find breathtaking portraits of salvation, redemption, and restoration.

Perhaps no book of the Bible paints a clearer picture of this then the Gospel of John. Throughout the Gospel of John, the beauty of God radiates in the person of Jesus Christ—the one in whom God displayed his whole heart for the world to see. It’s within the person of Jesus that we find the invisible attributes of God being made visible, on display like the fine pieces of artwork in this gallery—to be enjoyed, celebrated, and reflected upon.

For more info, check out PursuingGodBibleStudy.com.

I’ll be giving away one copy of each of these studies. To be eligible to win, leave a comment, ReTweet, or share on Facebook. Make sure you tag me so I can add you to the drawing! Drawing will be held on Friday, September 23rd, at 9:00 pm.

 

iStock photo user: Fabervisum

Good leaders listen well. They don’t merely anticipate.

I was at the bank yesterday, and as I left I said to the teller, “Bye, see you later!” To which she replied, “I hope you have a good day, too!”

She anticipated because she had heard the same thing from every customer that day. She thought she heard, “Have a good day!” She should have listened more carefully.

Not a big deal, because the response that my bank teller makes to me on the way out doesn’t make or break my day, but it does point out an important principle.

Listen before you answer.

Listen before you answer…

• When you’re talking with your spouse and you feel like you already know what they’re going to say
• When you’re in a hurry and you wish the person would just hurry up
• When you’re the small group leader and you’re “expected to have the right answer”
• When someone is going to ask your advice
• When someone is not going to ask your advice, they’re just sharing their story
• When you’re talking with an “extra grace required” person
• When you’ll be expected to give a response and you’re not sure what you’re going to say.

The temptation is to move ahead and prepare what your response will be. That way, you’ll appear smart and on top of things.

But you’re better off listening fully before processing your answer.

Those who are sharing their heart with you will feel honored and respected knowing you truly care about them.

And when they throw you a curve ball, like I did my bank teller, you’ll be ready.

He who answers before listening — that is his folly and his shame. – Proverbs 18:13

Question:

Have you ever tried to anticipate what someone was going to say, and gotten it wrong?

Have you ever had a conversation with someone when they appeared absent?

*photo credit, iStock Photo user: Fabervisum

 

My friend, Brad House (on Twitter HERE), has written a book, Community: Taking Your Small Groups off Life Support, that calls on you to wake up to the life-changing, community-altering reality of biblical, authentic, Gospel-centered community.

This book will challenge you to take your groups to the next level, equipping your church to facilitate small groups focused on transformation through the Gospel.

Check out this promo, then pick up a copy HERE.

 

iStockPhoto, user: Noriko Cooper

In the last week, I’ve had multiple pastors ask this question. Maybe it’s one you’re asking, too.

How do I structure my first small group meeting?

I think that pastors are asking it for a couple of reasons:

1. They don’t have small groups in their local church.

They’re trying to get groups off of the ground, and don’t have a template for how a group should launch.

2. They have small groups in their local church, but they want to ensure, as much as possible, that their personal small group succeeds.

I get that. You’re the pastor, and if your group “fails,” it reflects badly on you, who point people to the life-changing power of community. If your group “fails,” does “community” really work? (hint: the answer is that yes, it does still work…but you may just need to think critically about the dynamics of a small group)

The way that you structure your first few meetings will set the tone for the rest of your group’s life. Getting off to a slow start is a massive hindrance to success because relationships aren’t well-formed, group becomes “difficult” for people to attend, and most won’t see it as worth the trouble.

There are a few key principles to keep in mind as you launch your group. Whether that’s a singles group, a couples group, or anything in between, keeping these in mind is important to your group’s short-term and long-term success.

5 Non-Negotiables in Launching Your Small Group

1. Know what the “win” is for your group.

If you don’t know what you’re aiming for, you’ll never know if you hit it. Define the “win” for your group, and keep those front and center as you launch. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter tremendously (obviously within biblical parameters) what that win is…just that you define it. Define that win and go hard after it. *If you don’t know what the win is for your group, have a conversation with your groups pastor…if you don’t have a groups pastor, talk with your lead pastor for direction.

2. Incorporate “fun” into your group.

You may lead a phenomenal Bible study…but if people don’t feel like they’re having “fun,” they won’t come back. Don’t believe me? No problem…just test it out. Don’t laugh or play a game or have any fun, and see if people come back. After you’ve tried that, and your group has dissolved to 1, come on back and read this again. The reality is that people can get great Bible studies anywhere: podcasts, books, blogs, and forums. They can’t get a real, authentic, enjoyable relationship with people from a podcast, though. I’ve written about this more extensively HERE and HERE.

3. Incorporate “serving” into your group.

If you don’t launch with a focus on serving together, your group won’t naturally gravitate towards it. You have to build this as a value into your group. Whether your goal is once/week, once/month, or once/quarter, set some goals and offer some ideas for the group to chew on. Maybe it’ll be a ministry you believe in. Maybe it’s something in your neighborhood. Maybe it’s something that someone else in the group is passionate about. That’s not as important as building in the idea of serving your community.

4. Share your faith story.

Sharing your faith story, and encouraging others to do the same, is essential to building healthy community. If, in the first 8 weeks of your group, you haven’t done this, your group will feel stale and cold. Lecturers have no need to share their story…but small group leaders do! This is a vital step to building authentic community.

5. Share responsibility.

Don’t hoard the responsibilities you’ve been entrusted with in leading your group. It’s important that everything gets done, but you don’t need to do everything. In fact, if you do everything, you’ll burnout. You’ll also not equip others to lead and use their gifts and resources, which should be a role of all group leaders…equipping others to do the work of the ministry by fleshing out their gifts.

When you’re ready to launch your group, keep these 5 non-negotiables handy.

Question: Do you lead a small group? What am I missing? Anything you would add?

*photo credit: iStockPhoto, Digital Skillet

 

Thought this video from the guys at North Coast Church was worth the share.

Enjoy.

Growth Groups: Bungee from North Coast Church on Vimeo.

 

I need you and your gifts. Because without you, I’m incomplete.

Without you, I look silly.

Without you, I look like a mouth. I can scream and shout, but I can’t hear anything. And do you know how annoying that is…the guy who talks but doesn’t listen?

Without you, I’m a hand that’s stuck in one place. I can’t move. I need you. I’m like The Thing. Just plain weird.

Without me, you’re a foot that can walk anywhere it pleases…but can’t pick anything up. Because…have you ever tried to hold a hammer with your foot? Ever tried to write a note with your foot? Good luck with that.

Without me, you’re a set of eyes that can do nothing about what you see. And I can’t even begin to fathom how frustrating that would be.

I need you and you need me. There’s just no getting around that.

And when we work together, it’s called the Church.

We’re better together.

Yes, the body has many different parts, not just one part. If the foot says, “I am not a part of the body because I am not a hand,” that does not make it any less a part of the body. And if the ear says, “I am not part of the body because I am not an eye,” would that make it any less a part of the body? If the whole body were an eye, how would you hear? Or if your whole body were an ear, how would you smell anything? – 1 Corinthians 12:14-17

 

 

Growing up in the church, I’ve heard many, many different public prayers.

image via iStock Photo

Small group prayers are the best. They’re personal, genuine, and heart-felt. What’s better than requesting prayer, then having someone pray for you right there on the spot?!?  My most intense times of prayer, when I’ve felt closest to God, have been in the context of healthy community.

But there’s one thing I’ve noticed. And I don’t think I’m the only one who’s heard this. In fact, I think it’s the most commonly used prayer phrase. And when it’s used, it stands out like that one final nail that you still haven’t hammered in on the pergola in your backyard.  All you hear is this phrase.   It usually comes after a brief, awkward, I-don’t-know-what-to-say-now pause.  Maybe you’ve heard it.  It goes like this:

…and that situation…

“Lord, please be with Sally and Vick this week, and help them out…and that situation.”

“God, you know better than I do all of the difficulties John is facing in life…and that situation.”

“Lord, you love Gary, and I ask you help him out with his house…and that situation.”

“And that situation” becomes the way to close the deal. Hang up the phone with God. It sounds irreverent to say, “Later, God…” and so the question is, “How do I tell God, and the small group, that I’m done with that request?”

Enter “and that situation.”

It’s a fantastic catch-all, really. Because when you say it, everyone in the room goes, “Ohhh…that situation. Yeah, that’s bad. That situation.”

Here are 5 other times when “and that situation” fits beautifully.

5 Times for the “And That Situation”

1. When you’ve not listened closely enough to the request to remember the details, just drop a “and that situation.”

No reason to listen closely anymore when people share their prayer requests.  You’ve got a perfect fall-back, catch-all, I-love-each-and-every-person-in-my-group phrase.  Repeat after me: And. That. Situation.

2. When your group isn’t close enough to share the details of life, and you honestly don’t know the details of “that situation.”

Don’t press in to know people. That’s too difficult and too “honest.”  Let it ride.  “And that situation.”

3. When you have no idea what else to say, slip in a “and that situation.”

If it doesn’t naturally fit, it’s okay.  God will fist-bump you for hanging up the phone with class.

4. When you don’t know the person you’re praying for very well.

“Would they be comfortable with me repeating details before God?  Would God even want me to do that?”  Don’t make things too awkward.  Don’t try to get to know them later on so that next time you pray you won’t question things.  ”And that situation” that thing and move right on.

5. When you don’t have the words to adequately express your heart, push things back on God.

The Holy Spirit intercedes for us, right? I bet his “groans” sound something like a holy “and that situation.” (see Romans 8:26)

Question:

Have you ever heard little phrases creep in to your prayers?

Have you ever heard “and that situation?”

 

My small group is way, way better than yours.  Why?

2 words: catfish fry.

Last week, we had our small group, including children, over to our house to fry up some catfish, french fries, and hushpuppies.  We topped that off with roasted marshmallows for dessert.  You. Can. Not. Beat. That.  Even if you get all “holy” and “we-study-the-Bible” on me.

But I’ll give you a chance, in just a moment.

Let me tell you about a new site, Only144.com.  It’s like Groupon, but for churches.  They’re a brand new company, trying to get word out about what they do.  They’ll be offering phenomenal deals for churches on various resources.  This has the potential to really help local churches out in a huge way.

In fact, they’ll be offering some small group curriculum that has the chance to shape your church culture in a huge way.

And in order to help get the word out about their new site, they’re willing to give away $600 worth of curriculum here through my blog!

If you win, you’ll get:

• Philippians small group study, by Matt Chandler
• Love Life small group study, by Mark Driscoll
• Song of Solomon small group study, by Tommy Nelson

This contest on my blog is super-short…less than 24 hours!

If you’d like to enter, please do at least 1 of the following:

1. Leave a comment below trying to convince me that your small group is better than mine.  Good luck with that.

2. Tweet or Facebook the following: My small group’s awesomer than yours…about to win $600 in resources to prove it! Details: http://ow.ly/5PPaT

In your tweet, mention me using @benreed, or in your Facebook status be sure to tag me so I can find your post and include you in the drawing.

Feel free to enter the contest as many times as you’d like…each time you Tweet, Facebook, or comment, you’re entering your name into the pot.

The contest will end on Friday, July 29th, at 12:00 pm central time.  So hurry up and get those entries in!

 

I enjoy conferences. I think that they help leaders tremendously. I’ve written before about why I go and what I take.

Conferences get you out of your normal environment. They introduce you to new ideas from thought leaders that are in related, but not identical fields, and they give you a chance to dream. But you know what the biggest problem with conferences is?

They’re expensive.

• Gas (or airline)
• Food
• Hotel
• Time away from family
• Ticket for the conference

I’m excited to tell you about an opportunity to attend a conference on the cheap.

The 12 Conference:

• It’s online, so no travel expenses
• The individual ticket is $45 ($195 for a site license)…that’s cheap!
• You get to hear from trusted leaders from around the country
• It’s not just a Saddleback thing. Check out the list of speakers HERE.
• You can bring your whole team for $195!
• You can invite other churches to be a part of the event with you, for just $600.  This would be a great way to include other churches and ministries.
• You’ll have access to the notes and videos for 30 days on demand.
• Interact with other attendees at the conference. 12 is being driven by interaction, not just information. When you sign up, you’ll be grouped together with other churches that are similar in size, and throughout the sessions, the speakers will give you a chance to interact with each other based on the session you’re in. It will feel like you’re attending a live conference.
• 2 days, 3 tracks, 8 sessions, 36 speakers…tons of content.

If you’re attending, let me know…because I’ll be there, too. I’m leading a handful of sessions.

The conference happens “live” on September 14-15.  Register HERE.

But even if I weren’t, this is a conference I’d be a part of.

I love this line that’s a part of the promo for the conference:

We are not in the business of producing conferences.  We are in the business of equipping leaders to do Kingdom work.

You in?