Photo credit: Creative Commons User Herzensangelegenheit

I need you to use your gifts.

Because when you use your gifts, something awakens in me.

I can’t always explain it, but

• when you teach, light bulbs go off.
• when you sing, my heart sings.
• when you lead, I follow.
• when you serve, I want to serve.
• when you love, I understand God a little better.
• when you give, I want to give.
• when you open your home, I feel God’s presence.
• when you share your wisdom, life makes more sense.

You see things I don’t see. Hear things I don’t hear. Taste things I don’t taste. Understand things I don’t understand.

When you use your gifts, I see God in a new light.

As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace. – 1 Peter 4:10

*Photo credit: Creative Commons User Herzensangelegenheit 

 

Mark Driscoll founded Mars Hill Church in Seattle, Washington. He also founded the Acts 29 Church Planting network, as well as The Resurgence.

Mark spoke on fear.

In dealing with fear, the first question to ask is this:

What are you afraid of?

Heights? Widths? Mice? Bugs? Snakes? Spiders? Clowns?

Conflict? Failure? Criticism? Embarrassment?

Fear in the mind causes stress in the body.

It’s invariable that leaders have fear. Your body starts to manifest the fear. Maybe that’s a nervous eye twitch. Maybe that’s canker sores.

Then you start eating badly or drinking too much.

You start getting sinus problems and headaches. Some of you just start reading a lot of books on the rapture, wanting this life to just be over.

Mark was afraid when he started Mars Hill: what if this doesn’t work?

Then people came, and his fear was: what if they stay?

Luke 12:25 says, “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?”

Fear is not always a sin, but it is always an opportunity

In dealing with fear, the second question to ask is this:

Who are you afraid of?

This is one of the most important question a leader can ask. Because someone other than God is taking the place that only God should have in our lives. We feel like we need someone to feed us, praise us, and not oppose us…we begin to need them for life. We place people in positions of fear, then we worship them as functional gods.

When you fear someone, you cannot love them. Because to love someone is to give to them, but to fear them is to take from them.

The key of all idolatry is that we trade the creator God for created things…and other people are the likely candidates for this.

Proverbs 29:25 shows us that the fear of man is a trap. It may be that you’re afraid of someone, or that you’re in awe of a person, giving them too much influence on your spiritual, emotional, and spiritual well-being.

The fear of man is fearing others instead of God. At a young age, it’s called peer pressure. As adults, it’s called co-dependency or people pleasing.

Do you have a fear of man problem?

• Whose opinion matters way too much to you?
• Is your appetite for praise too healthy?
• Are you overly devastated by criticism? Criticism may hurt…but it shouldn’t devastate. Criticism is constant, instant, permanent, and global. (Rick Warren)
• Are you committed to things and people that God did not call you to? Don’t follow other people’s calling on your life…follow God’s.

What is fear?

1. Fear is vision without hope.

Fear means that we see vision in the worst possible scenario, and we freak out. Fear sees the future, and says that it’s going to be painful and so it drives you to stress and fear.

2. Fear isn’t always rational, but it is always powerful.

3. Fear is about not getting what we want

…or getting what we want and losing it…or getting what we don’t want.

4. Fear preaches a false Gospel.

It says, “There is a potential Hell awaiting you, and you could have an alternative heaven on earth, so you need a functional savior.” It gives us a false hell, a false heaven, and a false savior. It’s a savior that we, through fear, have created in our imagination.

5. Fear turns us all into false prophets.

Ever been afraid of a future event, then when you got there, it wasn’t just like you thought it would be?

What is the solution to fear?

The Bible says, “Fear not.” Which is the most frequently listed commandment in the whole book.

But the Bible says that it’s not just about facing your fears…it’s about being with God.

The Bible on Fear

• Adam, our first father, as we see in Genesis 3, is afraid after he sins. He’s hiding, and God comes to him and answers his fear by being present with Adam. He pursues Adam in the midst of his fear.
• Abraham, in Genesis 15:1, is told to fear not because God is his shield.
• Isaac, in Genesis 26:24, is told to fear not because God is with him. He’s told to remember he’s not alone.
• Genesis 28:15: “I am with you.”
• Exodus 33:14, Moses is told that God’s presence will go with him. “how can I lead these people? I don’t know where we’re going, but I’ve got to lead them!” God’s answer isn’t “here’s a map,” but it’s “here I am.”
• Elijah, on the battlefield, in 2 Kings 1:15, “Fear not!” (on the brink of war)
• David: Psalm 23 says, “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will not fear, because God is with me.” Things may not be ok, but I’m ok because God is with me.
• Isaiah 41:14: “Do not fear, you worm of Jacob.” Can you think of anything more defenseless than a worm? Little girls pick them up and mock them. “Little Israel, fear not, for I myself will help you.” Though the fears are real, the lack of resources is real…fear not, I bring resources.
• Jeremiah 1:8 – fear not, for I am with you.” Jeremiah has lots to be afraid of. He smote sad that indie rockers. He’s the “weeping prophet.” “Why did I get out of my mother’s womb? Cursed is the man who brought my mother the news that I was going to be a boy.” He couldn’t’ even get married. He was depressed, by himself, an indie rocker poet.
• Daniel 10:12: fear not, Daniel, for I have come.”
• Haggai 2:4-5: be strong, be strong, be strong.” Be strong because God is with him.
• What did God tell Mary through the angel? Fear not, teenage girl. God will be with you.
• Matthew 28:20 – “I will be with you.”

You know what we have to fear more than anything? DEATH.

But the worst thing that can happen to you is that you die and go to be with Jesus. We need to reset our worst-case scenario. The worst-case scenario is that you go to be with Jesus sooner rather than later…that’s not so bad!

When times are at the hardest, and your grief goes the deepest, remember, “Fear not, God is with you.”

Everything may not be ok, but if God is with you, you’re ok.

 

Photo: Creative Commons User: Polježičanin

Information isn’t the most important thing anymore. We live in a world where content isn’t king.

Right content is king.

Today, you can turn anywhere and find any answer to any question you can come up with.

Message ChaCha and within 60 seconds, you’ll have your answer. From a real person!

“Google” is a verb used in common language.

Information is abundant and around every corner. You can have nearly every major newspaper delivered wirelessly to your Kindle.

Our culture is on information overload. The answer is not found in more information.

The answer is in curating the right information.

Which explains the success of sites like Take Your Vitamin Z, Monday Morning Insight, and Between Two Worlds. This generation is not just looking for more information. We’re looking for the right information.

• I don’t just care to go to a movie because it’s a big-budget blockbuster. I’ll go because someone I trust has recommended it.
• I won’t read your book because a big-name publisher has printed it. I’ll read it because someone I trust has reviewed, or recommended, it.
• I won’t watch a TV show because a television network pubs it. I’ll watch it because someone I trust encourages me to do so.
• I won’t buy a product because an advertisement sells me, but because you, whom I trust, “sells” me on it.

Trust is rooted in relationship

• Social media interaction helps engender trust.
• Real, offline relationships help engender trust.
• Consistently helpful information engenders trust.
• Honesty engenders trust.
• Vulnerability engenders trust.

If the next generation of writers, communicators, and leaders wants to be effective, they’ll learn to develop trust, not just rely on content. And trust is rooted in a relationship.

In a culture of information saturation, we’re looking for a reason to follow someone’s lead.

Pastors:

Are you finding this to be true in your church?

 *Photo Credit: Creative Commons user Polježičanin’s

 

Dave Ramsey, author, radio host and TV host, started his talk at Catalyst 2011 with the question:

What does it really mean to be present as you’re engaging in leadership?

He has decided he’s going to run his business God’s way.

Leadership matters.

5 things about leadership that matter:

1. In order to be present, you’ve got to understand that people matter.

• The #1 correlation between your success and failure is your relational IQ.
• When you’re having an interaction with someone, listen for their story.

2. An incredible team and a culture of excellence matters.

• If we’re not careful, we’ll be surrounded by people who need more help that they can give.
• You can’t win the Kentucky Derby if you’ve got a donkey.
• When you put someone in the wrong seat on a bus, the whole organization suffers.
• Spend time on the staffing/interview process.
• Don’t intentionally bring ‘crazy’ into the building.

3. Slow and steady matters.

• Don’t let your ministry, workplace, and life go faster than your resources.
• When you’re growing faster than you’ve got money, you’re about to have problems.

4. Financial principles matter.

• Stay out of debt
• Save.
• Have a plan.
• Spend less than you make.
• Learn to be generous.

5. A higher calling matters.

• Do your work as unto the Lord.
• Opportunity will be attracted to excellence.

Care about the “why” not just the “what.”

The “why” is the most important part. Readdress your higher calling each and every day.

Do you see leadership as essential?

 

Andy Stanley, pastor at North Point Community Church, opened the main sessions at Catalyst 2011.

He challenged those at the conference with these statements as they related to the theme, “Be Present.”

The more successful you are, the less accessible you will become.

For many this is frustrating. For others, this is liberating. But this is simply a leadership truth. And it’s not a bad thing.

There’s part of us that reads this and says, “Not me. I’ll always be accessible.”

 Refuse to face this reality and burn out by trying to be accessible to everyone.

You get stretched really thin if you ignore this principle. You can only be really, truly accessible to very few people. Over time, your body is in many different locations, and your mind goes with it.

 Some people use success as an excuse to become more inaccessible than necessary.

We see people using success as an excuse. Over time, the one who spreads himself too thin is no longer “present.”

Some people like to live with the mantra:

Unawareness is bliss.

The more aware you are of the needs around you, the more you often feel helpless and put-upon. Because no problem is fixed in 30 minutes, is it?

Being aware of the problems around us wears us out.

The Apostle Paul helps us with this.

Let us not become weary in coing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. Galatians 6:9-10

Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2

You have limited time and opportunity, but as you have time and opportunity…

Here’s the truth from this passage:

• You can’t shut it all out.
• You can’t hide in your office from people.
• You can’t take it all on.

In ministry, this is one of the primary tensions you have to manage. There is no solution for this. If you ever solve this problem, your heart is hard towards people.

This is the phrase that Andy lives by, and the one he lives out with his family all of the time:

Do for one what you wish you could do for everyone.

In school, when people asked the lunch lady, “Can I have an extra cookie?” she’d respond with, “If I give it to you, I have to give it to everyone.” To which you reply, “No you don’t…you can just give it to me!”

Fairness ended in the garden of Eden.

Nothing has been fair since. Fair is nothing to shoot for.

Don’t be fair. Be engaged.

3 tips to be engaged:

1. Go deep rather than wide.
2. Get involved with an individual couple.
3. Go long-term rather than short-term

If you give every single one of your leaders who’s struggling an hour…you’ll be burned out. You’d be better off giving one couple 20 or 30 hours. If you don’t, it’ll rob your joy.

This is a challenge for me, personally. I would like to be able to “fix” everything. I’m grateful for Andy’s wisdom here. I needed it for sure.

Are you tempted to “fix” everything and everyone?

 

I’m at Catalyst Conference this week, and I’ll be blogging what I feel are some of the most important sessions.

In this lab session, Michael Hyatt spoke on the importance of the leader’s heart.

On a retreat in college, Michael’s pastor said this:

Based on my experience, by the time you are 55 years old, 10% of you will act like you never knew Jesus at all. 70% of you will be compromised. 20% of you will still be following Christ, and if you want to be a part of that 20%, you have to make a commitment to be in it for the long haul.

This had a profound impact on his life.

What happens to the 80% that don’t make it? Those people lose heart in some way.

This truth is particularly important for leaders.

You will maximize your influence as a leader when you embrace 5 truths about the heart.

5 Truths About Your Heart

1. Your heart is the essence of your identity.

This is particularly important to grasp in a world of social media, where the image triumphs the reality. Don’t lose yourself in your image! The Bible uses the word, “heart” over 1,000 times. Matthew 5:8. Matthew 6:23. Matthew 15:18. Matthew 22:37.

Today, you are you. That is truer than true. There is none alive that is you-ier than you. – Dr. Seuss

The essence of who you are is your heart. It’s where your dreams, hopes, fears, love, and disappointment live in this sanctuary. But the world’s focus is too often on the external image.

In 1 Samuel 16.7, we see that the Lord looks at the heart, because that’s what matters most.

A question that John Eldredge asked rocked Michael’s world:

How is your heart?

2. Your heart is the most valuable leadership tool you have.

Proverbs 4:23 says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” It doesn’t say, “If you can squeeze ‘guarding your heart’ into your to-do list…” Your heart is the wellspring of life!

We often think that leadership is about your knowledge, experience, or skills. But it’s about your heart…because it’s the wellspring of life.

A few things about springs:

• If you stop up a spring, it stops flowing.
• If you pollute a spring, then what comes out is toxic.

The same is true for your heart.

3. Your heart directly impacts your influence.

Physically, your heart keeps you alive. Your body can’t survive without this vital organ.

Hyatt was brought to the hospital and treated for pneumonia, but 4 days later, he was rushed back to the hospital because of a ruptured gall bladder. But he has found out that, as important as it is, he’s really okay without a gall bladder. But if you lose your heart, you’re dead.

This is also true in a spiritual sense. Your heart is what keeps your organization alive. As a leader, you pump personality into every person and project you meet. Your organization can survive without your skills and knowledge, but it can’t survive without your heart. Your heart is the greatest gift you bring to your organization.

4. Your heart is either healthy or unhealthy

Cardiovascular disease happens in our bodies when arteries harden and blood flow is constricted. Cardiovascular disease is the quiet killer.

Spiritually, it is as well. It takes leaders out when they don’t even know it. And the truth is this: your heart is either open or closed.

When your heart is closed, it looks like this:

distant, aloof, lost in your own problems, can’t connect with people, communication shuts down, leave people on your team to fend for themselves, and people feel oppressed as life and possibility dries up.

But when your heart is open, it looks like this:

When you’re a leader with an open heart, you’re fully present and accessible. You’re focused on others, you connect to people, communication is wide open, you’re a resource to your people, you may focus on what is missing but you don’t focus on what’s wrong (be careul…it’ll suck the life out of your team), people feel free, you’re pumping life and possibility into the organization.

It matters if your heart is open or closed.

5. Your heart is under constant attack.

Satan’s primary objective is to take you out and render you ineffective for God. We do have an enemy, and he takes us out at the level of the heart. We can allow disappointment, disillusionments, and failures to steal our heart if we don’t guard it.

You’re never too old to do something stupid. Don’t ever give up!

Proverbs 4:23 encourages us to guard our hearts. Because there’s something valuable and precious there that needs to be guarded.

Satan is particularly adept at taking out the hearts of Christian leaders. Because he knows that if he takse you out he can take many others out with you. People are watching and hoping that you’re going to make it.

Having close friends is a key to keeping your heart alive, especially considering that pastor burnout is such a massive problem.

The heart is like a drawbridge. Sometimes it needs to be drawn up. But other times it needs to be let down and let others in.

We’re called to love and lead from our heart.

 

Make volunteers feel special!

image via Creation Swap

When I was a senior in high school, I was a part of the organization called National Honor Society. And though it felt at times that we existed as an organization purely to meet in between 4th and 5th periods, we did do some good.

One afternoon, we took a trip to an elementary school to help them promote their Fall Halloween Festival. We read books to the students, interacted them, and encouraged them to invite their families to the event that night. My main role was to hand out little trinkets to each student as they left the auditorium. I know…incredibly exciting and important. But I took it upon myself to make each and every student feel special.

So I’d act like each each student coming through was the only person on the planet who got that little spider ring. That spider ring was, according to all standards of financial reason, worthless. But according to that student, their little plastic spider ring was more valuable than a brand new diamond ring.

It’s all about perspective and value.

Which relates to all areas of leadership.

Value and Celebrate Volunteers

If you value those you lead, they’ll feel valuable.

Treat them like they’re a hired hand, and that’s exactly what they’ll feel like.

Treat them like without them you’d suffer. Let them know that their contribution matters.

Email them. Call them. Text them. Take them to lunch. Buy them a cup of coffee. Write them a letter. Have a dinner where you honor them. And give them a plastic spider ring while you’re at it.

Whatever you do, make them feel valued. Make them feel like they’re insiders.

Better yet…make them insiders.

*image via Creation Swap user: Amber Sprung

 

I like you. I genuinely do.

Most of you I know personally because we’ve had conversations either online or in person.

And just to say, “Thanks,” I’d like to give you something.

The guys at Right Now are putting on a conference for lead pastors, student pastors, and young adult pastors. It’s also for anyone who is responsible for casting vision, leading people, and equipping people to serve.

And don’t forget that it’s for small groups pastors, discipleship pastors, assimilation pastors, and anyone responsible for carrying out the Church’s mission through Bible studies, discipleship, or groups.

Francis Chan, Matt Chandler, and Matt Carter will all be there. It’s really a premier conference.

The conference happens from November 2-4, 2011. More details HERE.

And I’ve got 3 tickets to give away! (1 ticket per person)

To enter, just do (at least) one of the following (1 point/action below):

1. Subscribe to this blog. By email click HERE (just follow the instructions…it’s really easy), or by RSS HERE.

2. Tweet or Facebook (or both) this, making sure to tag me: Want to score a free ticket to Right Now 2011? Check out @benreed ‘s blog here: http://ow.ly/6ELRF 

3. “Like” Life & Theology on Facebook HERE.

4. You must leave a comment below, simply telling me how many of these you’ve done (1 for each of the above).

I’ll choose the winners via random.org on Friday, September 30th.

Good luck!

 

Ever seen someone and you just can’t remember their name?

It’s embarrassing.

And if you’re in a position where you’re in front of a lot of people very often, likely there will be people who know your name, but you don’t know theirs. Still embarrassing.

I’ve got some things that I’m working on to help me better remember names, but I want to save embarrassment for others who aren’t working on it if that’s at all possible. So here’s my number one rule when I introduce myself:

Assmume nobody remembers my name.

Always assume someone has no idea who you are. (If they happen to remember your name, you’ll be pleasantly surprised!)

Then give them the context for how they know you.

Where did you meet? How long ago? Why should they know you? What’s the connection?

Assume they don’t know your spouse either. It’ll put them at ease, because if they don’t remember exactly they’ll be wracking their brain. If they have no recollection of who you are, this *rule* will help them tremendously. Trust me.

As soon as you act like someone should know who you are, you come across as a diva. And nobody wants to be a diva or talk to one.

So give people the easy road. Remind them of your name. And you’ll save everyone a little embarrassment and disappointment.

Question:

Are you good at remembering names?

Photo credit: Creative Commons user Bump

 

Creation Swap User Savannah Daniel

Having a team of people around you that agree with you on everything feels great in the moment. You feel like a king issuing awesomeness at every turn. Every idea, every decision, every complaint and every shout is greeted by a resounding, “Yes!” You can’t do anything wrong. Everybody wants to be you.

Little do you know, you may be leading your organization straight into the ground.

While I was in grad school, I called these guys, “lackeys.” Familiar with the term? A lackey is, formally, someone who does menial tasks or runs errands for another.” (Merriam-Webster) I define it as someone who is constantly at your beckon call. In grad school, these were the guys who wore suits to class every day and ran little errands around for the professor. It was pitiful, really. Everywhere the professor went, so did the lackey. These guys were little clones, thinking and teaching like their leader.

Every leader can find little “lackeys.” Every leader, however, should surround themselves with people who think and operate differently.

Because a “Yes” man just could demolish your vision.

6 Reasons a “Yes” man will Demolish your Vision

1. Maybe you need to hear, “No.”

For “no” – I can sometimes have some dumb ideas. Really dumb. And I need someone to say, “Nope. Move on. Start moving in a different direction.”

2. Maybe you need to hear, “Yes.”

I have a tendency to be pretty hard on myself. Yet sometimes my ideas are really good. And I need someone to come alongside me and encourage me with, “Yes, your’e headed in the right direction even though you may think you’re not.”

3. You need pushback on your ideas

I process things out loud, so I need someone who’s going to push back on my ideas and not just take them at face value because I said them. I need the occasional, “Why? Are you sure? Why now? Why him? Why not this?” Reminder to self: you’re not as great as you think.

4. Unity is not the same as conformity.

We should pursue unity, but that doesn’t have to be conformity. Unity means that we can operate together as a team even though we have differing ideas. Unity promotes healthy growth. Conformity can produce growth, but it can also lead to a cess pool of thoughts that never evolve and get better.

5. Commiserating can take you down a dangerous path.

Ever headed there? It starts out innocently. You’re tired and frustrated, so you vent to someone else. And instead of them saying, “Whoa…hang on. You’re pretty bitter and angry right now. Why don’t you take a breather and come back in a few minutes?” They say, “Whoa…you’re right. That’s awful. In fact, it’s worse than you thought. Let me tell you about ___.” If you’ve ever been there, you know that this is a slippery slope.  ”He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.” – Proverbs 13:20

6. “Leaders” are vital.

Leaders think for themselves and help the organization pursue what’s best for it. They don’t exist just to follow your leadership. They’re using the gifts God’s given them, and when they do that it is a thing of beauty for them and for you. Leaders produce leaders…followers do not. “Yes” men aren’t necessarily leaders. If you’ve only got followers in your organization right now, don’t expect them to produce, and attract, leaders.

Question:

Do you have people in your life that frustrate you because they always push back on your ideas?

*photo credit: Creation Swap user: Savannah Daniel